Ok. Nama pun laman sesawang kan. Mestilah bersawang gak kan. heee.
*ko memang lah, wahai allan suka kasi alasan xmunasabah tolong jadi orang sikit oiii*
err. ok. memandangkan aku kegeraman aku melihat my super hot gojes miss Hanis Zalikha, maka terdetik jugak aku nak post jugak hari ini walaupun sebenarnya tak ada point nak cakap padahal kalau dok teremenung sorang2 ataupun dok diam2 membonceng motor hausmet di belakang tu akan datang segala ilham siap bersusun ayatnya namun disebabkan tidak ada masa langsung nak taip maka segala nukilan hati dan perasaan berkubur begitu sahaja di dalam salah satu ganglioksida ku adoiii =___=
oh ya. bukan setakat miss HZ jek... rupa2nya seisi keluarga HZ berbelogging kau... monsterjambu (iaitu adik2 HZ) dan maknya aku lupa dah nama nya tapi korg sefamily ni mmg gler ahh sumer kaki bloging banyak cerita korg kongsi mmg mcm dah kenal kelaurga korg sejak azali gitu haha...
How's my life? well honestly mmg sangat penat dan setiap kali kau tanya jawapannya tidak akan berbeda pasti akan ku kata teramat amat amat la penat kan aku mmg tension la adoiiii kenapa kenapa kenapa aku tersangkut di tempat ini huhhhhh------ =___=
Ok allan. tarik nafas. hembus. tarik lagi. hembussss.
dah. xleh buat banyak nanti bagai mau org pecah air ketuban je gamaknya. -.-
hmmm apa lagi apa lagi apa lagi mau dibebelkan sebenarnya aku dah takda point makkk tolonglah saya saya dah malu sesegan pulak ni patut lah kau asik bersawang je blog ni gamaknya asik xda idea nak taip padahal dalam stor memori otak genit ko tu sebenarnya banyak je kan nak cerita tapi memandangkan nanti ada stalker nak memfitnah aku jadi yg mana tak patut tu aku simpan jelah kan tapi eh hanis tu citer je sumer kat org ramai dan hidup dia aku tgk aman bahagia sejahtera je tanpa gangguan segala bagai adoiii memang sama ada aku ni paranoid atau pun yg sebenar benar benarnya kan kan kan allan ni pemalas nak berbelog je kan kan kan aku pening nak taip segala bagai sepanjang masa aku ni jenis nak membebel je gamaknya sampai aku citer kat sumer org dgr ke xdgr yg penting mesej bebelan aku sampai pada semua sampai puas hati aku lepas segala terbuku di hati maka saya mintak maap la kepada sesiapa yg telinganya panas atau yg masanya terbuang kepada aku kan kan so mintak maap zahir batin la ye alang2 nak deepavali ni kan ko yenna oiiiiiiiiii~~
huh. memang semenjak dua menjak ni ayat aku sumer senafas tidak berhenti maka tiada jugalah titik noktah yg banyak kali ni so korg cuba baca laju2 kasi sama speed mcm aku bebelkan ni xpe3 xkena saman kalo baca melebihi had laju baccan anda puhh aku buat perangai lagi kan kan kan adoiiiiii~~~
hurm xpelah. taw2 je kan, xda benda nak cakap. last2 tgk panjang gak. kesengalan tol. oh well. wish me for finals anyway~
oh, aku xcerita pasal aku nyer finals eh eh eh? heee my bad... it's just just just around the corner, i really3 need a miracle to maintain the value of aprroximate 3... mak jgn putus asa dgn saya ok... huhu~
ok sekian. (X___x)
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Monday, August 23, 2010
Selingan
Al-kisah aku tersangat bz selepas naik cuti semester kelmarin..
Tersangat bz sampaikan bersawang balik aku punya blog ni.. sorry~ =_=
So, any updates mmg aku letak kat FB jelah, macam biasa..
Life's been like hell since i was back here in campus.. and lagi bz dari sem2 sebelum ni.. Gosh. I really hate everything about my course right now.
Well, org ckp kelas masak2 mcm kulinari tu best. seronok. macam2 nak dimasaknya cik kiah oii~
truth is, it's hell. Pernah tgk Hell's ktichen kat AFC?
ha macam tulah seksanya. benci~
In fact, my life has been restricted becoz of that.
Social life yg xpuas dh. Even nak main FB pun xenjoy.
Xtaw pun apa yg jadi kat member2 aku yg disayangi sekalian...
Dak2 FAC, geng KITA, and few more frens that are the dearest to my heart...
sorrylah xamik tau pasal korg..
tibe2 ada yg in a relationship la, ada yg ada konflik la, mcm2 hal la korg..
t ada masa kita hapdate story ya kwn2~~
well, bkn stakat FB..
nak tido pun rasa bersalah..
benci.
ya ar. Lab ada 3 sem ni.
so mmg sgt bz la.. asik keja nak keja buat lab repot la..
mcm haram~ grrrr...
err, sbenarnya nak ucap kat korg,
selamat menyambut ramadhan al-mubarak..
tibe2 jadi post emo plak teehee..
(but anyway, sejak dua menjak ni aku mmg asik emo je kan~ huh~ -_-)
So, that's all for now..
Kalo rajin i'll update more, if not,
jumpalah di hari raya nanti~
sekian =_+
Tersangat bz sampaikan bersawang balik aku punya blog ni.. sorry~ =_=
So, any updates mmg aku letak kat FB jelah, macam biasa..
Life's been like hell since i was back here in campus.. and lagi bz dari sem2 sebelum ni.. Gosh. I really hate everything about my course right now.
Well, org ckp kelas masak2 mcm kulinari tu best. seronok. macam2 nak dimasaknya cik kiah oii~
truth is, it's hell. Pernah tgk Hell's ktichen kat AFC?
ha macam tulah seksanya. benci~
In fact, my life has been restricted becoz of that.
Social life yg xpuas dh. Even nak main FB pun xenjoy.
Xtaw pun apa yg jadi kat member2 aku yg disayangi sekalian...
Dak2 FAC, geng KITA, and few more frens that are the dearest to my heart...
sorrylah xamik tau pasal korg..
tibe2 ada yg in a relationship la, ada yg ada konflik la, mcm2 hal la korg..
t ada masa kita hapdate story ya kwn2~~
well, bkn stakat FB..
nak tido pun rasa bersalah..
benci.
ya ar. Lab ada 3 sem ni.
so mmg sgt bz la.. asik keja nak keja buat lab repot la..
mcm haram~ grrrr...
err, sbenarnya nak ucap kat korg,
selamat menyambut ramadhan al-mubarak..
tibe2 jadi post emo plak teehee..
(but anyway, sejak dua menjak ni aku mmg asik emo je kan~ huh~ -_-)
So, that's all for now..
Kalo rajin i'll update more, if not,
jumpalah di hari raya nanti~
sekian =_+
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
The Loneliest Day Ever :(
28th June.
Well, that's my birthday..
At least to those who really3 remembered it...
Today is (or was) 28 June, year 2010..
And it was on my semester holidays..
Unlike on previous years, I expected this time around, my birthday should be much more fun and enjoyable!
But it was not. :(
27th June, 9.00 pm.
I just realized it was my birthday tomorrow!
Well, I was expecting my birthday around the corner.. I was aware it was June!
But, how could I missed the exact date? Seeing the date on my laptop, then it got to my sense.. I'm 20 in a few hours! Damn.. :(
But no matter, I'll be count-downing that moment, what will be, will be!!
I was still chatting with few of my friends, surprisingly no one was aware of my countdown.. :(
28th June, 12.00 midnight.
People started to wish me Happy Birthday! I was happy!
Within the next 30 min, my wall was packed with wishes from various friends that I knew during the course of my life.. I was touched..
Despite that, no midnight surprises.. Oh well..
28th June, 1.00 am.
Okay.. Is it me, or my birthday wishes was the courtesy of Facebook?
Yeah, it was. Thanks to that, everyone in my friends list was reminded that today IS my birthday..
Oh well, at least few noticed that and bothered to greet me anyway..
So, credits to Facebook..
(hey, I'm guilty myself. So no harm done.)
28th June, 2.30 am.
A very best friend of mine from high school YM-ed me, and chatted with me for over an hour.. Not anything related to my birthday, but he was consulting me about his problem.. Being a good friend of his, I heard his problem and gave him a solution..
Thank goodness, I did have a solution to his problem. Case closed, and I'm glad to do goodness on my birthday.. (although he did not realize my birthday at all.)
28th June, 4.30 am.
My wall started to cool down, and so I decided to have a well-deserved nap..
Sweet dreams, may my day be a bliss!
28th June, 9.00 am.
I woke up, but the bed was too comfy.. Ah, another snooze, and I'll be fine~
28th June, 11.15 am.
Gosh! Overslept! But I was doing okay.. My mother called from work (no need to know what my mother's work anyway.. It's complicated), and so she asked me to get ready and we (me, father, her, and another person) can all go out in a moment..
28th June, 11.45 am.
Got my long beauty bath, and I was doing my hair, everything!
It's my birthday, and I should look good! I'm 20 today!
(Gosh. I am old. @___@ )
No matter.. I'm looking good~
28th June, 11.55 am.
This is the exact time when I was born.. (Yeah, I remembered most details in my birth cert..) But, no words from my mom..
28th June, 12.45 noon.
We're almost at Jaya Jusco Permas Jaya.
During a light conversation in the car (and that somebody else was driving, using the company's car) my mother suddenly remembered (read my words.. suddenly remembered) that it was my birthday.. Somehow she managed to get that detail from her memory.. Gosh.
Ok! At least she wished you. Fine.
28th June, 1.15 pm.
Mother decided to grab a bite at the Old Town White Coffee cafe..
Ok, I don't mind. We had toasts (yeah, toasts. boringgggggggggg)
During those bites, my parents was lecturing me about, everything!
"Have you started packing?" "Err, soon?" "OMG!! yep yep yep.."
"Careful driving!!! yep yep yep"
"I've looked your bank account, what have you been doing? yep yep yep"
Gosh. For god's sake, it's my birthday! They didn't took the effort to make me feel it was my birthday today. grrrrrr.
28th June, 1.45 pm.
My mom was doing the groceries around. (This is her work. Yeah, again. It's complicated.)
I was around and about, looking stuffs that I need to buy before I go back to my uni.
Sigh. Holiday's are almost over.
Alas, nothing was available.. (seriously, hypermarkets here, are not as diverse with products, as in KL.. but that nagging needs to hold. I've got bigger issues here..)
So, I got nothing for myself. None.
28th June, 2.15 pm.
I was supposed to follow my mother and continues grocery shopping at Cold Storage and somewhere else. That's my kind of outing with my mother. Seems boring, but this is the kind of outing that existed between us. huhu..
Unfortunately, my father has better ideas. I have to go to the bank. An errant that has to be done.
Sigh. Fine then.
28th June, 2.20 pm.
Mother dropped us off, and I drove with father to ___bank. Guess what I was supposed to do? Get a new account book. The previous one was already full, since I got it since 2005. #$^%$^%$^&*&%^$##.
Why today???? Any day but today????????? ^*&^&*%^&%*(**(.
28th June. 2.25 pm.
I was queuing for this bloody account book. The effing bloody account book.
Patience is virtue anyway. (is it? Not!!)
Why la these M'sians have to cut queue in the bank!
#$%^^&*&... Do I need to cope with this?
On my birthday?????
28th June. 3.00 pm.
I've wasted my birthday in the bank.
The bloody effing bank. With slowpoke services.
When I could enjoy it somewhere else. %&&%*(^&%^&...
28th June. 3.10 pm.
Home. Home bloody home.
I'm reaching my boiling point now.
I didn't bother to have lunch.
28th June. 3.11 pm.
Facebooking. Still, more wall posts coming in.
Seriously, did Facebook only noticed my birthday???
(I mean Facebook. Not my certain unconcerned friends.)
28th June. 4.00 pm.
My mother asked me to pick her up from work. Fine.
Drove down to her workplace, but what the heck?
Detour.. Got myself a topup (Still, my phone was as dead as a frozen fish. Just one or two person was still in contact.. grrrr..)
And to cheer myself up, I got myself a cool-blog! (that sweet drink with that wrapped thingy watsoeva n it got "pearls" inside the drink? yeah that.)
28th June. 4.20 pm.
Had a quick stop to a friend's place, she gave me few stuffs, and I gave her this new shirt that didn't fit me..
But then, mother called. Demanding me to pick her up at that instant.
God. *took a deeeeeep breath*
28th June. 4.30 pm.
Mother was yapping again. Commenting about my driving watsoeva.
(How could I drive well? I was fury.)
I am reaching my breaking point.
Why won't you realize it's your son's birthday????????????????
28th June. 4.31 pm.
Dozens of missed call from my father.
I can drive okay??????
28th June. 4.40 pm.
Reached home. No parking.
Squeezed the car somewhere in between. I couldn't care even more.
Mother just rushed in. She needs her lunch.
And I was left to drag all of these bloody groceries (that she got for home, separated from her work, you wouldn't know what I mean.)
My parents wouldn't even cared. I dragged everything in.
And as usual, heavy work = sweating like a pig. &(*&)(*)^&*%^*&....
28th June. 4.50 pm.
Dumped the whole lot in the kitchen.
Got into my room. Changed. Bathed. Facebooking.
28th June. 5.15 pm.
My mother couldn't stop bothering me for the day.
She yapped about something. But I can't take it anymore.
If it's a normal day. Fine. Put up with it.
But today was wayyyyyyyyy to much hell.
28th June. 5.18 pm.
Left and rushed to my room.
"There he goes again. You can't anything anymore these days, and he'll be off just like that. Sulking whatever."
Ok. That statement of mother crossed the line.
You treated your son just perfectly on his birthday. )*^&%$^$^&....
28th June. 5.25 pm.
Breakdown. I cried. And cried.
I'm soooooooooooo enjoying my birthday.
Son of a *)^&% .
Now where's my friend to celebrate my birthday?
NONE! everyone was on through Facebook.
Effing hell!! No one bothered to even consider a celebration for my birthday.
NONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Come on.. Don't cheat on me.
It's holiday. My friends are at home.
I'm at home. Home effing home.
Some got their own ride.
Some could do it. But then. No one bothered.
Don't you come and say "heyyyy, so sorryyyyy.. It's not like we didn't forget you or so...."
Because it's a damn lie.
Some of you were having a dinner out together, by the way.
Yeah. It's Dated today. 28th June.
Besties huh? Great. Extraordinarily great.
I was dissapointed. Extremely.
Now I knew (no, now i confirmed 100%)
that some of you didn't want me around in the first place.
I'm the one who's idiot enough to tag along with the previous programmes.
Until I had issues with my mother. Lots of times. Stupid sacrifices.
And those others, I've nothing more to say..
I hoped that somebody, I mean somebody, could come down and greet me for real.
I didn't get any phone calls anyway. Just the Facebook. grrrrr.
Except for one or two, I've no idea what's going on anymore..
I just realized that i can make free calls for the whole day, but nobody's worth of my call...
(To those who feels bad about this post, I'm sorry. I'm just having an extremely bad birthday. You wouldn't know, anyway.)
28th June. 6.00 pm.
Laying down on the floor.
Thinking. I'm 20.
Celebrating my birthday by myself.
On the floor.
28th June. 7.00 pm.
Anyone? Hangouts or something?
Please????????????????
28th June. 8.00 pm.
Last call.. Anyone??
Please... I beg you.... (T_T)
28th June. 8.10 pm.
I didn't bother to get out of the room.
Didn't bother to help my mother in the kitchen.
Heartbroken.
I don't care anything for now.
Numb.
Offended with my parents.
Offended with my friends.
28th June. 8.40 pm.
Dinner.
No appetite.
Just plain rice n dishes.
Thanks mother, but it's as the same as any other ordinary day.
28th June. 9.00 pm.
Great. Another thing I've realized.
My 4 brothers n 2 sisters.
and none wished me.
none.
28th June. 10.00 pm.
I give up.
My life sucks.
And it sucks like hell.
28th June. 11.00 pm.
Late posters on the wall, here they come.
Thanks alot, anyway.. At least you had an effort there..
28th June. 11.45 pm.
Wow. My birthday was so far so good. NOT.
29th June. 12.00 midnight.
It's official. I've celebrated my birthday with house curfews,
continuous nagging and no birthday cake.
Great. Extremely great.
And I thought having a birthday on a holiday would make a change once in a while..
Finally a one fine day to celebrate happily with my family and friends.
Guess it didn't go as what I imagined.
29th June. 4.00 pm.
Putting the dot on this post.
A million thanks to those who wished me birthday by Facebook, SMS or instant message (YM).
I hope that this post did not offend you, it's just me telling the truth of how i felt the moment i was 20 today.
Well, at least you bothered to wish me online though.
It's the thought that matters.
It's the thought that matters.
Well, that's my birthday..
At least to those who really3 remembered it...
Today is (or was) 28 June, year 2010..
And it was on my semester holidays..
Unlike on previous years, I expected this time around, my birthday should be much more fun and enjoyable!
But it was not. :(
27th June, 9.00 pm.
I just realized it was my birthday tomorrow!
Well, I was expecting my birthday around the corner.. I was aware it was June!
But, how could I missed the exact date? Seeing the date on my laptop, then it got to my sense.. I'm 20 in a few hours! Damn.. :(
But no matter, I'll be count-downing that moment, what will be, will be!!
I was still chatting with few of my friends, surprisingly no one was aware of my countdown.. :(
28th June, 12.00 midnight.
People started to wish me Happy Birthday! I was happy!
Within the next 30 min, my wall was packed with wishes from various friends that I knew during the course of my life.. I was touched..
Despite that, no midnight surprises.. Oh well..
28th June, 1.00 am.
Okay.. Is it me, or my birthday wishes was the courtesy of Facebook?
Yeah, it was. Thanks to that, everyone in my friends list was reminded that today IS my birthday..
Oh well, at least few noticed that and bothered to greet me anyway..
So, credits to Facebook..
(hey, I'm guilty myself. So no harm done.)
28th June, 2.30 am.
A very best friend of mine from high school YM-ed me, and chatted with me for over an hour.. Not anything related to my birthday, but he was consulting me about his problem.. Being a good friend of his, I heard his problem and gave him a solution..
Thank goodness, I did have a solution to his problem. Case closed, and I'm glad to do goodness on my birthday.. (although he did not realize my birthday at all.)
28th June, 4.30 am.
My wall started to cool down, and so I decided to have a well-deserved nap..
Sweet dreams, may my day be a bliss!
28th June, 9.00 am.
I woke up, but the bed was too comfy.. Ah, another snooze, and I'll be fine~
28th June, 11.15 am.
Gosh! Overslept! But I was doing okay.. My mother called from work (no need to know what my mother's work anyway.. It's complicated), and so she asked me to get ready and we (me, father, her, and another person) can all go out in a moment..
28th June, 11.45 am.
Got my long beauty bath, and I was doing my hair, everything!
It's my birthday, and I should look good! I'm 20 today!
(Gosh. I am old. @___@ )
No matter.. I'm looking good~
28th June, 11.55 am.
This is the exact time when I was born.. (Yeah, I remembered most details in my birth cert..) But, no words from my mom..
28th June, 12.45 noon.
We're almost at Jaya Jusco Permas Jaya.
During a light conversation in the car (and that somebody else was driving, using the company's car) my mother suddenly remembered (read my words.. suddenly remembered) that it was my birthday.. Somehow she managed to get that detail from her memory.. Gosh.
Ok! At least she wished you. Fine.
28th June, 1.15 pm.
Mother decided to grab a bite at the Old Town White Coffee cafe..
Ok, I don't mind. We had toasts (yeah, toasts. boringgggggggggg)
During those bites, my parents was lecturing me about, everything!
"Have you started packing?" "Err, soon?" "OMG!! yep yep yep.."
"Careful driving!!! yep yep yep"
"I've looked your bank account, what have you been doing? yep yep yep"
Gosh. For god's sake, it's my birthday! They didn't took the effort to make me feel it was my birthday today. grrrrrr.
28th June, 1.45 pm.
My mom was doing the groceries around. (This is her work. Yeah, again. It's complicated.)
I was around and about, looking stuffs that I need to buy before I go back to my uni.
Sigh. Holiday's are almost over.
Alas, nothing was available.. (seriously, hypermarkets here, are not as diverse with products, as in KL.. but that nagging needs to hold. I've got bigger issues here..)
So, I got nothing for myself. None.
28th June, 2.15 pm.
I was supposed to follow my mother and continues grocery shopping at Cold Storage and somewhere else. That's my kind of outing with my mother. Seems boring, but this is the kind of outing that existed between us. huhu..
Unfortunately, my father has better ideas. I have to go to the bank. An errant that has to be done.
Sigh. Fine then.
28th June, 2.20 pm.
Mother dropped us off, and I drove with father to ___bank. Guess what I was supposed to do? Get a new account book. The previous one was already full, since I got it since 2005. #$^%$^%$^&*&%^$##.
Why today???? Any day but today????????? ^*&^&*%^&%*(**(.
28th June. 2.25 pm.
I was queuing for this bloody account book. The effing bloody account book.
Patience is virtue anyway. (is it? Not!!)
Why la these M'sians have to cut queue in the bank!
#$%^^&*&... Do I need to cope with this?
On my birthday?????
28th June. 3.00 pm.
I've wasted my birthday in the bank.
The bloody effing bank. With slowpoke services.
When I could enjoy it somewhere else. %&&%*(^&%^&...
28th June. 3.10 pm.
Home. Home bloody home.
I'm reaching my boiling point now.
I didn't bother to have lunch.
28th June. 3.11 pm.
Facebooking. Still, more wall posts coming in.
Seriously, did Facebook only noticed my birthday???
(I mean Facebook. Not my certain unconcerned friends.)
28th June. 4.00 pm.
My mother asked me to pick her up from work. Fine.
Drove down to her workplace, but what the heck?
Detour.. Got myself a topup (Still, my phone was as dead as a frozen fish. Just one or two person was still in contact.. grrrr..)
And to cheer myself up, I got myself a cool-blog! (that sweet drink with that wrapped thingy watsoeva n it got "pearls" inside the drink? yeah that.)
28th June. 4.20 pm.
Had a quick stop to a friend's place, she gave me few stuffs, and I gave her this new shirt that didn't fit me..
But then, mother called. Demanding me to pick her up at that instant.
God. *took a deeeeeep breath*
28th June. 4.30 pm.
Mother was yapping again. Commenting about my driving watsoeva.
(How could I drive well? I was fury.)
I am reaching my breaking point.
Why won't you realize it's your son's birthday????????????????
28th June. 4.31 pm.
Dozens of missed call from my father.
I can drive okay??????
28th June. 4.40 pm.
Reached home. No parking.
Squeezed the car somewhere in between. I couldn't care even more.
Mother just rushed in. She needs her lunch.
And I was left to drag all of these bloody groceries (that she got for home, separated from her work, you wouldn't know what I mean.)
My parents wouldn't even cared. I dragged everything in.
And as usual, heavy work = sweating like a pig. &(*&)(*)^&*%^*&....
28th June. 4.50 pm.
Dumped the whole lot in the kitchen.
Got into my room. Changed. Bathed. Facebooking.
28th June. 5.15 pm.
My mother couldn't stop bothering me for the day.
She yapped about something. But I can't take it anymore.
If it's a normal day. Fine. Put up with it.
But today was wayyyyyyyyy to much hell.
28th June. 5.18 pm.
Left and rushed to my room.
"There he goes again. You can't anything anymore these days, and he'll be off just like that. Sulking whatever."
Ok. That statement of mother crossed the line.
You treated your son just perfectly on his birthday. )*^&%$^$^&....
28th June. 5.25 pm.
Breakdown. I cried. And cried.
I'm soooooooooooo enjoying my birthday.
Son of a *)^&% .
Now where's my friend to celebrate my birthday?
NONE! everyone was on through Facebook.
Effing hell!! No one bothered to even consider a celebration for my birthday.
NONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Come on.. Don't cheat on me.
It's holiday. My friends are at home.
I'm at home. Home effing home.
Some got their own ride.
Some could do it. But then. No one bothered.
Don't you come and say "heyyyy, so sorryyyyy.. It's not like we didn't forget you or so...."
Because it's a damn lie.
Some of you were having a dinner out together, by the way.
Yeah. It's Dated today. 28th June.
Besties huh? Great. Extraordinarily great.
I was dissapointed. Extremely.
Now I knew (no, now i confirmed 100%)
that some of you didn't want me around in the first place.
I'm the one who's idiot enough to tag along with the previous programmes.
Until I had issues with my mother. Lots of times. Stupid sacrifices.
And those others, I've nothing more to say..
I hoped that somebody, I mean somebody, could come down and greet me for real.
I didn't get any phone calls anyway. Just the Facebook. grrrrr.
Except for one or two, I've no idea what's going on anymore..
I just realized that i can make free calls for the whole day, but nobody's worth of my call...
(To those who feels bad about this post, I'm sorry. I'm just having an extremely bad birthday. You wouldn't know, anyway.)
28th June. 6.00 pm.
Laying down on the floor.
Thinking. I'm 20.
Celebrating my birthday by myself.
On the floor.
28th June. 7.00 pm.
Anyone? Hangouts or something?
Please????????????????
28th June. 8.00 pm.
Last call.. Anyone??
Please... I beg you.... (T_T)
28th June. 8.10 pm.
I didn't bother to get out of the room.
Didn't bother to help my mother in the kitchen.
Heartbroken.
I don't care anything for now.
Numb.
Offended with my parents.
Offended with my friends.
28th June. 8.40 pm.
Dinner.
No appetite.
Just plain rice n dishes.
Thanks mother, but it's as the same as any other ordinary day.
28th June. 9.00 pm.
Great. Another thing I've realized.
My 4 brothers n 2 sisters.
and none wished me.
none.
28th June. 10.00 pm.
I give up.
My life sucks.
And it sucks like hell.
28th June. 11.00 pm.
Late posters on the wall, here they come.
Thanks alot, anyway.. At least you had an effort there..
28th June. 11.45 pm.
Wow. My birthday was so far so good. NOT.
29th June. 12.00 midnight.
It's official. I've celebrated my birthday with house curfews,
continuous nagging and no birthday cake.
Great. Extremely great.
And I thought having a birthday on a holiday would make a change once in a while..
Finally a one fine day to celebrate happily with my family and friends.
Guess it didn't go as what I imagined.
29th June. 4.00 pm.
Putting the dot on this post.
A million thanks to those who wished me birthday by Facebook, SMS or instant message (YM).
I hope that this post did not offend you, it's just me telling the truth of how i felt the moment i was 20 today.
Well, at least you bothered to wish me online though.
It's the thought that matters.
It's the thought that matters.
Friday, June 18, 2010
Puasa Bloging... Say What???
Haha... Tengok title pun dah pelik..
Inilah kesan dah lama tak blogging...
So kira aku tengah puasa blogging la tu kan? teehee~
*padahal alasan semata-mata kot. tak guna ko mamat~*
So sorry sebab dah lama tak isi blog ni dengan citer-citer aku..
Dan since few months back aku dok letak dalam blog ni cerita-cerita lawak yang ntah pape ntah.. soweee~~~
Itu kira macam iklan la,, sementara korg menanti post aku,
(yang xpernah2 rajin nak buat) aku letak la benda2 yg mungkin korg enjoy...
sampaikan bilangan iklan tu lebih banyak dari total post aku taun lepas.. haha~
Cerita ada je yang nak dikongsi, tapi bile nak amik masa duduk dan nak menaip segala kisah yang aku nak story kat korg, jd malas la pulak..
Penghabisan aku dok main FB jek... sengal~ haha...
Nak buat camne, FB is sooo addictive!! lol~
Bayangkan, status aku since February 2009 - June 2010 ada sebanyak 592 posts! OMG!
(and this is real!!!~ siyesly~) Kalaulah blog post aku pun sebanyak itu.. Huh~
*xkan jadi nya... nak buat satu pun berjanggut menunggu~*
*kalaulah post aku banyak gini~ adeh~*
Anyway, kalo ada free time pun, penghabisan aku hibernate memanjang~ zzzzzzzzzzz~
And yang paling lawak tu, how in the world aku leh sentuh aku nye blog balik??
Gosh.. I wonder myself~ (_ _")>
Maybe sebab semakin ramai yang terjumpa blog aku.. (well, aku tak expect any readers pun kat blog aku.. xfeymes mana pun.. huhu)
Pastu siap kutuk blog aku bersawang la.. Adeh...
Ok la.. finally aku pun kasi update balik la blog ini~ (macam xikhlas jek.. *ye ar.. ngantok nih* ciss!)
Plus, aku "tersurf" blog org len.. (well, tak la tak sengaja sgt,, :P)
such blog like Hanis Zalikha, Kak Senduk, Jaytea Abdul, Oh tidak!, iamherleena...
ok la, iamherleena tu membe aku nyer.. xsangka ko pun dah ada blog.. heh~
tapi yang len tu siyes best giler!!!!
HZ ada karisma dalam post dia.. so sweet!!! boleh diabetes aku dibuatnya~
Kak Senduk.. well, err.. not your typical person, but post dia somehow best giler!
Setiap post dia aku baca, aku tergelak sampai nak kejang rahang ni.. haha~
And jaytea.. dia punya pun sgt sweet~ huhu..
Blog Oh Tidak! pulak kan, oh yes! so panas!! haha~ informatif n fun.. the best la!!
One thing la guys, blog depa ni sume so laid back taw...
Sgt meyenangkan mata, dan banner pun sgt kena!~
Bila aku compare balik dgn blog aku.. Oh my gucci...
Skema giler.. (patut la xda org nak baca blog ko kan?? padan muka haha~)
Jadi, officially aku announce bahawa blog aku ini
Siyesly, aku bersumpah untuk meng-improve-kan blog aku yg xseberapa ini
(dan xda pembaca.. perasan jelah ko mamat oi~)
err.. dan untuk kembali blogging sekerap aku update status FB aku~
serta muncul dalam post yg lebih santai seperti HZ..
*oh HZ.. ure my bebeh~~ nyanyi lagu justin bibir~*
haha... nantikanlah blog aku yg tak taw apa nak jadi ni~ huhu..
Lastly, pada sape2 yg ada idea camne nak ubah template blog aku,
or apa komen, idea watsoeva, tolong la plz3 kongsi dgn aku,,,
(korg gak yg nak baca kan.. ngeeee~)
Aku sentiasa open untuk improvements~ lalalala~
Back to hibernating, see you guys soon!~
(macam nak pergi jauh jek.. teehee)~
Inilah kesan dah lama tak blogging...
So kira aku tengah puasa blogging la tu kan? teehee~
*padahal alasan semata-mata kot. tak guna ko mamat~*
So sorry sebab dah lama tak isi blog ni dengan citer-citer aku..
Dan since few months back aku dok letak dalam blog ni cerita-cerita lawak yang ntah pape ntah.. soweee~~~
Itu kira macam iklan la,, sementara korg menanti post aku,
(yang xpernah2 rajin nak buat) aku letak la benda2 yg mungkin korg enjoy...
sampaikan bilangan iklan tu lebih banyak dari total post aku taun lepas.. haha~
Cerita ada je yang nak dikongsi, tapi bile nak amik masa duduk dan nak menaip segala kisah yang aku nak story kat korg, jd malas la pulak..
Penghabisan aku dok main FB jek... sengal~ haha...
Nak buat camne, FB is sooo addictive!! lol~
Bayangkan, status aku since February 2009 - June 2010 ada sebanyak 592 posts! OMG!
(and this is real!!!~ siyesly~) Kalaulah blog post aku pun sebanyak itu.. Huh~
*xkan jadi nya... nak buat satu pun berjanggut menunggu~*
*kalaulah post aku banyak gini~ adeh~*
Anyway, kalo ada free time pun, penghabisan aku hibernate memanjang~ zzzzzzzzzzz~
And yang paling lawak tu, how in the world aku leh sentuh aku nye blog balik??
Gosh.. I wonder myself~ (_ _")>
Maybe sebab semakin ramai yang terjumpa blog aku.. (well, aku tak expect any readers pun kat blog aku.. xfeymes mana pun.. huhu)
Pastu siap kutuk blog aku bersawang la.. Adeh...
Ok la.. finally aku pun kasi update balik la blog ini~ (macam xikhlas jek.. *ye ar.. ngantok nih* ciss!)
Plus, aku "tersurf" blog org len.. (well, tak la tak sengaja sgt,, :P)
such blog like Hanis Zalikha, Kak Senduk, Jaytea Abdul, Oh tidak!, iamherleena...
ok la, iamherleena tu membe aku nyer.. xsangka ko pun dah ada blog.. heh~
tapi yang len tu siyes best giler!!!!
HZ ada karisma dalam post dia.. so sweet!!! boleh diabetes aku dibuatnya~
Kak Senduk.. well, err.. not your typical person, but post dia somehow best giler!
Setiap post dia aku baca, aku tergelak sampai nak kejang rahang ni.. haha~
And jaytea.. dia punya pun sgt sweet~ huhu..
Blog Oh Tidak! pulak kan, oh yes! so panas!! haha~ informatif n fun.. the best la!!
One thing la guys, blog depa ni sume so laid back taw...
Sgt meyenangkan mata, dan banner pun sgt kena!~
Bila aku compare balik dgn blog aku.. Oh my gucci...
Skema giler.. (patut la xda org nak baca blog ko kan?? padan muka haha~)
Jadi, officially aku announce bahawa blog aku ini
Siyesly, aku bersumpah untuk meng-improve-kan blog aku yg xseberapa ini
(dan xda pembaca.. perasan jelah ko mamat oi~)
err.. dan untuk kembali blogging sekerap aku update status FB aku~
serta muncul dalam post yg lebih santai seperti HZ..
*oh HZ.. ure my bebeh~~ nyanyi lagu justin bibir~*
haha... nantikanlah blog aku yg tak taw apa nak jadi ni~ huhu..
Lastly, pada sape2 yg ada idea camne nak ubah template blog aku,
or apa komen, idea watsoeva, tolong la plz3 kongsi dgn aku,,,
(korg gak yg nak baca kan.. ngeeee~)
Aku sentiasa open untuk improvements~ lalalala~
Back to hibernating, see you guys soon!~
(macam nak pergi jauh jek.. teehee)~
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Baca pelan2 baru paham..
*Sila baca dengan penuh teliti ya....;D*
Story1:
Suatu malam, Senah terdetik hati nak makan2 di sebuah kedai Mamak..
Senah: Ane! mau roti telur sama kuah kari satu..
Mamak: oke..itu roti suda siap!
ngap ngap ngap...setelah sedap2 Senah menjamah rotinya,tiba2 Senah mengamok..
Senah: Woit ane..apa pasal ini kuah kari rasa semacam? ko bagi aku kari basi semalam ke?
Mamak: allo cik adik..lu makan saja suda~ kalu lu mau makan juga kari hari ni, lu datang esok lah.
Story2:
Di rumah sakit, penyakit asma Tok Abah semakin teruk hingga perlu dipasangkan salur tangki oksigen. Dikira sudah menjelang ajal, anaknya pun memanggilkan seorang Mudhin (tukang do’a) agar Tok Abah lebih tenang. Sedang asyik Pak Mudhin berdoa, tiba-tiba muka Tok Abah bertukar biru & tidak boleh bernafas. Tangannya menggigil. Dengan menggunakan bahasa isyarat Tok Abah meminta kertas dan pen. Sisa-sisa tenaga yang ada digunakan oleh Tok Abah untuk menulis sesuatu dan memberi kertas tersebut kepada Pak Mudhin.
Sambil berdoa Pak Mudhin terus menyimpan kertas tersebut tanpa membacanya kerana fikirannya dia tidak sanggup membaca surat wasiat tersebut didepan anak-anak Tok Abah. Tak lama kemudian Tok Abah meninggal dunia. Pada hari ke-7 meninggalnya Tok Abah, Pak Mudhin diundang untuk datang kerumah pusaka arwah..
Selesai berdo’a, Pak Mudhin berbicara, “Saudara-saudara sekalian, ini ada surat wasiat dari arwah Tok Abah yang belum sempat saya sampaikan, yang saya pasti ini adalah nasihat untuk anak cucunya semua. Mari kita sama-sama membaca suratnya”.
Pak Mudhin membaca surat tersebut, yang berbunyi :
“Mudhin jangan berdiri di situ…! Jangan pijak saluran oksigen aku...!”
Story3:
Satu keluarga yang berasal dari Kuala Terengganu nak balik beraya di Kemaman, tapi cuma ada sebuah Kancil je muat untuk 7 orang ahli keluarga tersebut. Maka si ibu kepada keluarga tersebut pun berkata,
Ibu: Guane nih..penuh kete. Dok muak ayoh mu wey!
Ayah: Betul jugok. Guane nok buak nih? Lamo dok sapa kampong.
Ibu: Tujuh oghang dokleh sumbak masuk kete kancil nih. Kecik do’oh.
...Mereka pun memerah otak memikirkan macam mana nak menyelesaikan masalah tersebut. Ruang terlalu sempit untuk tujuh orang, tiba-tiba anak mereka yang paling kecil berkata…
Anak: Abah, umi… Awang tau doh guane nok buak. Kite skarang ade tujuh oghang. Tamboh la soghang lagi. baru jadik ‘LAPANG’…!!!
Story4:
Suatu Petang, di pedalaman Sarawak Kapten Kompeni A (sebuah pasukan tentera) mengumpulkan anak-anak buahnya di khemah logistik.
“Saya ada 2 berita untuk kamu semua, berita baik & berita buruk. Berita baiknya, setelah 6 bulan lamanya, hari ini pakaian dalam kita semua akan diganti…!!”
“Hooreee! Siap, kapten!” jerit seluruh anggota Kompeni dengan gembira.
“Nah, sekarang berita buruknya. Abu, ganti pakaian dalam kamu dengan kepunyaan Ganesan. Ah Keong, kamu ganti dengan kepunyaan Ahmad…..;D”
Story5:
Seorang Suami yang bekerja di luar negara menghantar e-mail kpd isterinya di Malaysia..
"Senah ku sayang,
Bulan ni abang tak dapat memberi duit nafkah kerana duit gaji abang sudah habis dirompak semalam
Walau begitu, abang tetap menyayangi kamu Senah...terima lah ciuman kasih abang ini (muah x100~..)
Yang benar, Suamimu."
———————-
Seminggu lepas itu isterinya membalas…*
"Kakanda sayang,
Senah terima ikhlas tanda ciuman kasih abang itu, di bawah adalah senarai perbelanjaan…
1. Stok susu selama sebulan dari Muthu dengan bayaran 2 ciuman.
2. Orang Elektrik dari TNB pula dibayar dengan harga 7 ciuman.
3. Haji Seman pula bersetuju datang rumah setiap hari untuk menerima 2 atau 3 ciuman sebagai ganti duit sewa rumah.
4. Untuk belian barang2 dapur dari Kedai runcit Ah Keong, saya terpaksa berhutang kerana Ah Keong tak terima ciuman. jadi saya terpaksa ganti dengan bayaran lain...(harap awak tidak marah..)
5. Barang2 serta bil2 lain jumlahnya 40 ciuman.
Namun, abang tidak perlu risau kerana masih ada baki 35 ciuman lagi untuk belanja bulan depan.
Yang dikasihi, Isterimu"
Story6:
FAKTA !!
1. Kamu akan membaca sebuah fakta.
2. Namun, kamu akan terfikir yang mungkin ini adalah satu lagi fakta bodoh.
4. Kamu tak sedar no.3 tiada dalam senarai.
5. Sekarang kamu memeriksanya.
6. Dan kamu tersenyum.
7. Kamu masih terus membaca komen ini.
8. Kamu sedar yang komen2 diatas tadi semuanya adalah benar.
10. Kamu tak sedar lagi no.9 tiada dalam senarai.
11. Sekarang kamu memeriksanya.
12. Kamu tak perasan yang cuma terdapat 10 fakta sahaja yang tertulis.
Kerana ia adalah Fakta....
Sekian~
Story1:
Suatu malam, Senah terdetik hati nak makan2 di sebuah kedai Mamak..
Senah: Ane! mau roti telur sama kuah kari satu..
Mamak: oke..itu roti suda siap!
ngap ngap ngap...setelah sedap2 Senah menjamah rotinya,tiba2 Senah mengamok..
Senah: Woit ane..apa pasal ini kuah kari rasa semacam? ko bagi aku kari basi semalam ke?
Mamak: allo cik adik..lu makan saja suda~ kalu lu mau makan juga kari hari ni, lu datang esok lah.
Story2:
Di rumah sakit, penyakit asma Tok Abah semakin teruk hingga perlu dipasangkan salur tangki oksigen. Dikira sudah menjelang ajal, anaknya pun memanggilkan seorang Mudhin (tukang do’a) agar Tok Abah lebih tenang. Sedang asyik Pak Mudhin berdoa, tiba-tiba muka Tok Abah bertukar biru & tidak boleh bernafas. Tangannya menggigil. Dengan menggunakan bahasa isyarat Tok Abah meminta kertas dan pen. Sisa-sisa tenaga yang ada digunakan oleh Tok Abah untuk menulis sesuatu dan memberi kertas tersebut kepada Pak Mudhin.
Sambil berdoa Pak Mudhin terus menyimpan kertas tersebut tanpa membacanya kerana fikirannya dia tidak sanggup membaca surat wasiat tersebut didepan anak-anak Tok Abah. Tak lama kemudian Tok Abah meninggal dunia. Pada hari ke-7 meninggalnya Tok Abah, Pak Mudhin diundang untuk datang kerumah pusaka arwah..
Selesai berdo’a, Pak Mudhin berbicara, “Saudara-saudara sekalian, ini ada surat wasiat dari arwah Tok Abah yang belum sempat saya sampaikan, yang saya pasti ini adalah nasihat untuk anak cucunya semua. Mari kita sama-sama membaca suratnya”.
Pak Mudhin membaca surat tersebut, yang berbunyi :
“Mudhin jangan berdiri di situ…! Jangan pijak saluran oksigen aku...!”
Story3:
Satu keluarga yang berasal dari Kuala Terengganu nak balik beraya di Kemaman, tapi cuma ada sebuah Kancil je muat untuk 7 orang ahli keluarga tersebut. Maka si ibu kepada keluarga tersebut pun berkata,
Ibu: Guane nih..penuh kete. Dok muak ayoh mu wey!
Ayah: Betul jugok. Guane nok buak nih? Lamo dok sapa kampong.
Ibu: Tujuh oghang dokleh sumbak masuk kete kancil nih. Kecik do’oh.
...Mereka pun memerah otak memikirkan macam mana nak menyelesaikan masalah tersebut. Ruang terlalu sempit untuk tujuh orang, tiba-tiba anak mereka yang paling kecil berkata…
Anak: Abah, umi… Awang tau doh guane nok buak. Kite skarang ade tujuh oghang. Tamboh la soghang lagi. baru jadik ‘LAPANG’…!!!
Story4:
Suatu Petang, di pedalaman Sarawak Kapten Kompeni A (sebuah pasukan tentera) mengumpulkan anak-anak buahnya di khemah logistik.
“Saya ada 2 berita untuk kamu semua, berita baik & berita buruk. Berita baiknya, setelah 6 bulan lamanya, hari ini pakaian dalam kita semua akan diganti…!!”
“Hooreee! Siap, kapten!” jerit seluruh anggota Kompeni dengan gembira.
“Nah, sekarang berita buruknya. Abu, ganti pakaian dalam kamu dengan kepunyaan Ganesan. Ah Keong, kamu ganti dengan kepunyaan Ahmad…..;D”
Story5:
Seorang Suami yang bekerja di luar negara menghantar e-mail kpd isterinya di Malaysia..
"Senah ku sayang,
Bulan ni abang tak dapat memberi duit nafkah kerana duit gaji abang sudah habis dirompak semalam
Walau begitu, abang tetap menyayangi kamu Senah...terima lah ciuman kasih abang ini (muah x100~..)
Yang benar, Suamimu."
———————-
Seminggu lepas itu isterinya membalas…*
"Kakanda sayang,
Senah terima ikhlas tanda ciuman kasih abang itu, di bawah adalah senarai perbelanjaan…
1. Stok susu selama sebulan dari Muthu dengan bayaran 2 ciuman.
2. Orang Elektrik dari TNB pula dibayar dengan harga 7 ciuman.
3. Haji Seman pula bersetuju datang rumah setiap hari untuk menerima 2 atau 3 ciuman sebagai ganti duit sewa rumah.
4. Untuk belian barang2 dapur dari Kedai runcit Ah Keong, saya terpaksa berhutang kerana Ah Keong tak terima ciuman. jadi saya terpaksa ganti dengan bayaran lain...(harap awak tidak marah..)
5. Barang2 serta bil2 lain jumlahnya 40 ciuman.
Namun, abang tidak perlu risau kerana masih ada baki 35 ciuman lagi untuk belanja bulan depan.
Yang dikasihi, Isterimu"
Story6:
FAKTA !!
1. Kamu akan membaca sebuah fakta.
2. Namun, kamu akan terfikir yang mungkin ini adalah satu lagi fakta bodoh.
4. Kamu tak sedar no.3 tiada dalam senarai.
5. Sekarang kamu memeriksanya.
6. Dan kamu tersenyum.
7. Kamu masih terus membaca komen ini.
8. Kamu sedar yang komen2 diatas tadi semuanya adalah benar.
10. Kamu tak sedar lagi no.9 tiada dalam senarai.
11. Sekarang kamu memeriksanya.
12. Kamu tak perasan yang cuma terdapat 10 fakta sahaja yang tertulis.
Kerana ia adalah Fakta....
Sekian~
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
IT lesson??
Dear IT Support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slow down in the
overall performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but installed undesirable programs such as EPL 5.0, NBA 3.0 and ESPN 2.0. And now Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these
problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
Signed,
Desperate
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reply:
Dear Desperate,
First keep in mind; Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an
operating system. Try entering the command C:\ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and download Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0.
If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Late Night Teh Tarik 6.1. Late Night 6.1 is a very bad program that will create SnoringLoudly.wav files.
Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-Law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 6.9.
Good Luck,
IT Support
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slow down in the
overall performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but installed undesirable programs such as EPL 5.0, NBA 3.0 and ESPN 2.0. And now Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these
problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
Signed,
Desperate
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reply:
Dear Desperate,
First keep in mind; Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an
operating system. Try entering the command C:\ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and download Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0.
If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Late Night Teh Tarik 6.1. Late Night 6.1 is a very bad program that will create SnoringLoudly.wav files.
Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-Law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 6.9.
Good Luck,
IT Support
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Pity The Pilot..
Remember it takes a college degree to fly a plane but only a high school diploma to fix one. Reassurance for those of us who fly routinely in their jobs.
After every flight, Qantas pilots fill out a form, called a "gripe sheet, "which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor.
Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas' pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers. By the way, Qantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident.
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough...
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
P: Something loose in cockpit...
S: Something tightened in cockpit.
P: Dead bugs on windshield...
S: Live bugs on back-order.
P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear...
S: Evidence removed.
P: DME volume unbelievably loud...
S: DME volume set to more believable level.
P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick..
S: That's what they're for.
P: IFF inoperative...
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
P: Suspected crack in windshield...
S: Suspect you're right.
P: Number 3 engine missing...
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.
P: Target radar hums...
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
P: Mouse in cockpit...
S: Cat installed.
And the best one for last... ... ... ... ... ...
P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer
S: Took hammer away from midget
After every flight, Qantas pilots fill out a form, called a "gripe sheet, "which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor.
Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas' pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers. By the way, Qantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident.
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough...
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
P: Something loose in cockpit...
S: Something tightened in cockpit.
P: Dead bugs on windshield...
S: Live bugs on back-order.
P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear...
S: Evidence removed.
P: DME volume unbelievably loud...
S: DME volume set to more believable level.
P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick..
S: That's what they're for.
P: IFF inoperative...
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
P: Suspected crack in windshield...
S: Suspect you're right.
P: Number 3 engine missing...
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.
P: Target radar hums...
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
P: Mouse in cockpit...
S: Cat installed.
And the best one for last... ... ... ... ... ...
P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer
S: Took hammer away from midget
Kisah Kura-Kura Kedekut
Pada suatu hari, ada 3 ekor kekura (kura kura) nak gi bekelah bersama sama.Kekura pertama membawa makanan, Kekura kedua membawa minuman, sedangkan kekura ketiga tidak membawa apa-apa pun selamber jek lenggang perut.
Didalam perjalanan tiba-tiba ujan pun turun dengan lebat dan derasnya, sehingga mereka tak boleh meneruskan perjalanan.
Kemudian timbul perbualan di antara mereka.
Kekura I : "ERmmm..... salah sekor dari kita mesti balik untuk amik
payung. Siapa yang nak pegi ni?"
Kekura II dan I saling pandang memandang, dan sepakat menuding Kekura III.
Kekura III : "Tak nak ahhh. Aku jalan lambat dan nanti aku nak sampai sini lagilah terlambat. Sure nkorang akan bedal
mengkanan ni semua."
Kekura I & II : "Takk lah. Kita orang tunggu sampai nko datang."
Kekura III : "Betul??? Kalau aku lambat 1 jam?"
Kekura I & II : "Kita orang akan tetap tunggu."
Kekura III : "Kalau 3 jam ??"
Kekura I & II "Kita orang akan tetap tunggu."
Kekura III : "Kalau 1 hari ?? "
Kekura I & II : "Kita orang akan tetap tunggu."
Kekura III : "3 hari ???"
Kekura I & II :"Kita orang akan tetap tunggu."
Kekura III : "5 hari???? "
Kekura I & II : "Kita orang akan tetap tunggu."
Kekura III : "1 minggu? "
Kura I & II : ""Kita orang akan tetap tunggu."
Kekura III : "2 minggu?"
Kekura I & II : ""Kita orang akan tetap tunggu."
!!!!!!! nko pegi jek lah"
Dengan berat hati, akhirnya Kekura III pun
berangkat. Kekura I & II menunggu dengan setia. Sehari, dua hari dan
seminggu telah berlalu. Kekura III tak jugak balik balik. Setelah dua
minggu berlalu, Kekura I & II sudah tidak dapat menahan lapar.
Kekura I : "Aku dah tak tahan lapar ni . Kita makan jek lah "
Kekura II : "Aku pun dah nak pensan ni. Jom ahh kiter perabih
mengkanan ni"
Tiba-tiba Kekura III muncul dari semak-semak dan berseru " Hoii
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nasib baik aku belom pegi lagi... kalau
tak sure nkorang abiskan mengkanan ni kan kan????!!!!!!!!"
*mmg sah kedekut n xguna punya kawan.. korg buat cmni jgak ke? pikir la sndri~*
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Don't play play with the Power of Imagination!
Al-Kisah Karangan budak darjah 4...
Pagi itu pagi minggu. Cuaca cukup sejuk sehingga mencapai takat suhu beku. Sebab itu saya tidak mandi pagi sebab air kolah jadi air batu dan air paip tidak mahu keluar sebab beku di dalam batang paip. Pagi itu saya bersarapan dengan keluarga di dalam unggun api kerana tidak tahan sejuk. Selepas itu emak saya mengajak saya menemaninya ke pasar. Tetapi saya tidak mahu.
Selepas emak menikam perut saya berkali-kali dengan garfu barulah saya bersetuju untuk mengikutnya. Kami berjalan sejauh 120 kilometer kerana pasar itu letaknya 128 kilometer dari rumah. Lagi 8 kilometer nak sampai pasar saya ternampak sebuah lori kontena meluru dengan laju dari arah belakang.
Dia melanggar emak saya. Emak saya tercampak ke dalam gaung. Dia menjerit "Adoi!". Lepas itu emak saya naik semula dan mengejar lori tersebut. Saya pun turut berlari di belakang emak saya kerana takut emak saya melanggar lori itu pula. Pemandu lori itu nampak kami mengejarnya. Dia pun memecut lebih laju iaitu sama dengan kelajuan cahaya. Kami pula terpaksa mengejar dengan lebih laju iaitu sama dengan dua kali ganda kelajuan cahaya. Emak saya dapat menerajang tayar depan lori itu. Lori itu terbabas dan melanggar pembahagi jalan lalu bertembung dengan sebuah feri. Feri itu terbelah dua.
Penumpang feri itu yang seramai 100 orang semuanya mati. Pemandu feri itu sangat marah. Dia pun bertukar menjadi Ultraman dan memfire pemandu lori. Pemandu lori menekan butang khas di dalam lori dia..lori itu bertukar menjadi robot Transformer. Mereka bergaduh di udara. Emak saya tidak puas hati. Dia pun terus menyewa sebuah helikopter di Genting
Highlands dan terus ke tempat kemalangan. Dia melanggar pemandu feri yang telah bertukar menjadi Ultraman itu.
Pemandu feri itu terkejut dan terus bertukar menjadi pemandu feri semula lalu terhempas ke jalanraya. Pemandu feri itu pecah. Pemandu lori sangat takut melihat kejadian itu. Dia meminta maaf dari emak saya. Dia menghulurkan tangan ingin bersalam. Tetapi emak saya masih marah. Dia menyendengkan helikopternya dan mengerat tangan pemandu lori itu dengan kipas helikopter. Pemandu lori itu menjerit "Adoi..!" dan jatuh ke bumi. Emak saya menghantar helikopter itu ke Genting Highlands. Bila dia balik ke tempat kejadian, dia terus memukul pemandu lori itu dengan beg tangannya sambil memarahi pemandu lori itu di dalam bahasa Inggeris.
Pemandu lori itu tidak dapat menjawab sebab emak saya cakap orang putih. Lalu pemandu lori itu mati. Tidak lama kemudian kereta polis pun sampai. Dia membuat lapuran ke ibu pejabatnya tentang kemalangan ngeri itu. Semua anggota polis di pejabat polis itu terperanjat lalu mati. Orang ramai mengerumuni tempat kejadian kerana ingin mengetahui apa yang telah terjadi. Polis yang bertugas cuba menyuraikan orang ramai lalu dia menjerit menggunakan pembesar suara. Orang ramai terperanjat dan semuanya mati.
Selepas itu emak saya mengajak saya ke pasar untuk mengelak lebih ramai lagi yang akan mati. Di pasar, emak saya menceritakan kejadian itu kepada penjual daging. Penjual daging dan peniaga-peniaga berhampiran yang mendengar cerita itu semuanya terkejut dan mati. Saya dan emak saya terus berlari balik ke rumah. Kerana terlalu penat sebaik saja sampai di rumah kami pun mati. Itulah kemalangan yang paling ngeri yang pernah saya lihat sebelum saya mati.
Pagi itu pagi minggu. Cuaca cukup sejuk sehingga mencapai takat suhu beku. Sebab itu saya tidak mandi pagi sebab air kolah jadi air batu dan air paip tidak mahu keluar sebab beku di dalam batang paip. Pagi itu saya bersarapan dengan keluarga di dalam unggun api kerana tidak tahan sejuk. Selepas itu emak saya mengajak saya menemaninya ke pasar. Tetapi saya tidak mahu.
Selepas emak menikam perut saya berkali-kali dengan garfu barulah saya bersetuju untuk mengikutnya. Kami berjalan sejauh 120 kilometer kerana pasar itu letaknya 128 kilometer dari rumah. Lagi 8 kilometer nak sampai pasar saya ternampak sebuah lori kontena meluru dengan laju dari arah belakang.
Dia melanggar emak saya. Emak saya tercampak ke dalam gaung. Dia menjerit "Adoi!". Lepas itu emak saya naik semula dan mengejar lori tersebut. Saya pun turut berlari di belakang emak saya kerana takut emak saya melanggar lori itu pula. Pemandu lori itu nampak kami mengejarnya. Dia pun memecut lebih laju iaitu sama dengan kelajuan cahaya. Kami pula terpaksa mengejar dengan lebih laju iaitu sama dengan dua kali ganda kelajuan cahaya. Emak saya dapat menerajang tayar depan lori itu. Lori itu terbabas dan melanggar pembahagi jalan lalu bertembung dengan sebuah feri. Feri itu terbelah dua.
Penumpang feri itu yang seramai 100 orang semuanya mati. Pemandu feri itu sangat marah. Dia pun bertukar menjadi Ultraman dan memfire pemandu lori. Pemandu lori menekan butang khas di dalam lori dia..lori itu bertukar menjadi robot Transformer. Mereka bergaduh di udara. Emak saya tidak puas hati. Dia pun terus menyewa sebuah helikopter di Genting
Highlands dan terus ke tempat kemalangan. Dia melanggar pemandu feri yang telah bertukar menjadi Ultraman itu.
Pemandu feri itu terkejut dan terus bertukar menjadi pemandu feri semula lalu terhempas ke jalanraya. Pemandu feri itu pecah. Pemandu lori sangat takut melihat kejadian itu. Dia meminta maaf dari emak saya. Dia menghulurkan tangan ingin bersalam. Tetapi emak saya masih marah. Dia menyendengkan helikopternya dan mengerat tangan pemandu lori itu dengan kipas helikopter. Pemandu lori itu menjerit "Adoi..!" dan jatuh ke bumi. Emak saya menghantar helikopter itu ke Genting Highlands. Bila dia balik ke tempat kejadian, dia terus memukul pemandu lori itu dengan beg tangannya sambil memarahi pemandu lori itu di dalam bahasa Inggeris.
Pemandu lori itu tidak dapat menjawab sebab emak saya cakap orang putih. Lalu pemandu lori itu mati. Tidak lama kemudian kereta polis pun sampai. Dia membuat lapuran ke ibu pejabatnya tentang kemalangan ngeri itu. Semua anggota polis di pejabat polis itu terperanjat lalu mati. Orang ramai mengerumuni tempat kejadian kerana ingin mengetahui apa yang telah terjadi. Polis yang bertugas cuba menyuraikan orang ramai lalu dia menjerit menggunakan pembesar suara. Orang ramai terperanjat dan semuanya mati.
Selepas itu emak saya mengajak saya ke pasar untuk mengelak lebih ramai lagi yang akan mati. Di pasar, emak saya menceritakan kejadian itu kepada penjual daging. Penjual daging dan peniaga-peniaga berhampiran yang mendengar cerita itu semuanya terkejut dan mati. Saya dan emak saya terus berlari balik ke rumah. Kerana terlalu penat sebaik saja sampai di rumah kami pun mati. Itulah kemalangan yang paling ngeri yang pernah saya lihat sebelum saya mati.
Monday, January 18, 2010
Malu?
Malu bertempat ke tak? lu pikir la sendiri~
Sorang pompuan tu... TERberanak dalam lif. Punyalah dia malu... melalak dan tak mau keluar lif... Datang doktor cuba pujuklah pompuan ni... nak bawa ke hostipal.
"Marilah keluar amoi, saya bawak peligi hostipal". "Tak maulah doktor, saya malu" Kemudian kata doktor tu... "Apa nak dimalukan, tahun lepas saya ada kes lagi teruk punya malu.... TERberanak dalam longkang lagi!!!"
Tetiba, lagi kuat amoi tu lalak.... Doktor tercegang dan tanya kenapa nangis lagi kuat. Kata amoi tu... "Orang tu sayalah jugak!!!!".....
Sorang pompuan tu... TERberanak dalam lif. Punyalah dia malu... melalak dan tak mau keluar lif... Datang doktor cuba pujuklah pompuan ni... nak bawa ke hostipal.
"Marilah keluar amoi, saya bawak peligi hostipal". "Tak maulah doktor, saya malu" Kemudian kata doktor tu... "Apa nak dimalukan, tahun lepas saya ada kes lagi teruk punya malu.... TERberanak dalam longkang lagi!!!"
Tetiba, lagi kuat amoi tu lalak.... Doktor tercegang dan tanya kenapa nangis lagi kuat. Kata amoi tu... "Orang tu sayalah jugak!!!!".....
Kerja orang yang tiada kerja..
Tips agar tidak bosan di dalam lif 11 tips agar tidak bosan semasa di dalam lif:
1. Ketika anda hanya berdua dengan orang tak dikenali, cuit bahunya! Kemudian anda pura-pura melihat ke tempat lain..
2. Buat muka menyeringai kesakitan sambil pegang kepala anda dan menjerit "Diam, semuanya diam!".
3. Bawalah kamera dan ambillah gambar semua orang yang ada di dalam lif.
4. Pindahkan meja kerja anda ke dalam lif. Jika ada yang masuk, tanyakan apakah mereka sudah membuat temujanji?
5. Letakkan sebuah bungkusan di sudut lif, jika ada yang masuk, tanyakan apakah mereka mendengar bunyi tik...tik...tik...
6. Anda pura-pura jadi pramugari! Tunjukkan prosedur keselamatan penerbangan seperti di dalam kapalterbang.
7. Ketika pintu menutup, beri pengumuman kepada semua orang. "Bertenang, jangan panik, nanti pasti terbuka lagi!".
8. Bukalah beg tangan anda, sambil melihat ke dalam beg tangan, tanyalah "Udaranya cukup tidak disitu?"
9. Diam dan jangan bergerak sama sekali di sudut lif, menghadap dinding, jangan sesekali keluar.
10. Dengarkan suara di dinding lift dengan stetoskop.
11. Buatlah garis di lantai sekeliling anda menggunakan kapur, lalu beritahu "Ini adalah wilayah SAYA"
1. Ketika anda hanya berdua dengan orang tak dikenali, cuit bahunya! Kemudian anda pura-pura melihat ke tempat lain..
2. Buat muka menyeringai kesakitan sambil pegang kepala anda dan menjerit "Diam, semuanya diam!".
3. Bawalah kamera dan ambillah gambar semua orang yang ada di dalam lif.
4. Pindahkan meja kerja anda ke dalam lif. Jika ada yang masuk, tanyakan apakah mereka sudah membuat temujanji?
5. Letakkan sebuah bungkusan di sudut lif, jika ada yang masuk, tanyakan apakah mereka mendengar bunyi tik...tik...tik...
6. Anda pura-pura jadi pramugari! Tunjukkan prosedur keselamatan penerbangan seperti di dalam kapalterbang.
7. Ketika pintu menutup, beri pengumuman kepada semua orang. "Bertenang, jangan panik, nanti pasti terbuka lagi!".
8. Bukalah beg tangan anda, sambil melihat ke dalam beg tangan, tanyalah "Udaranya cukup tidak disitu?"
9. Diam dan jangan bergerak sama sekali di sudut lif, menghadap dinding, jangan sesekali keluar.
10. Dengarkan suara di dinding lift dengan stetoskop.
11. Buatlah garis di lantai sekeliling anda menggunakan kapur, lalu beritahu "Ini adalah wilayah SAYA"
Monday, January 11, 2010
Kalau boleh dah lama aku buat kat rumet aku..
Bengang dengan roommate? Tak tahu apa nak buat? Get ready for the payback time...
1. Setiap hari Jumaat, pack segala barang anda dan bagitau kat roommate anda nak balik kampung. Selepas sejam, balik ke bilik & terangkan bhw takde org kat rumah. Unpack segala brg anda & pegi tidor.
2. Setiap kali roommate anda balik, jerit sekuat hati" horee...kau dah balik". Lepas tu menari dlm 5 minit. Lepas tu, tenung jam lama2 dan tanya dia "Sepatutnya kau dah blah dah skrg"
3. Buat2 terjaga pd tengah malam, jerit kuat2 " Tolong, kat mana aku berada ni?" dan lari keliling bilik tu. Kalau bilik kecil, cukuplah sekadar melompat 2-3 kali. Kemudian, sambung tidor. Esoknya, kalo dia tanya, pura2 tak tahu apa yg dia cakap.
4. Ambil marker, buat bulatan kecil kat lengan anda. Besarkan bulatan tu setiap hari sambil berkata "Dah merebak... dah merebak!"
5. Beli pepokok bonsai. Bercakap & tidor dengan pokok tu setiap hari. Selepas seminggu, bertengkar dgn pokok tu dan cakap "Aku tak boleh hidup sebilik dengan kau lagi" sambil keluar & menghempaskan pintu bilik dgn kuat...Buang pokok tu tapi biarkan pasu kat situ.
6. Beli pisau banyak-banyak. Tajamkan setiap malam sambil merenung roommate anda sambil berkata "Tak lama lagi...tak lama lagi..."
7. Duduk didepan papan chess dua-tiga jam tanpa buat apa2 atau cakap apa2. Lepas tu bangun secara tiba2 sambil berkata, "Siot betul, kalah lagi"
8. Setiap kali roommate balik, tutup lampu dan tidor. lepas dia keluar, bangun dan menjerit dgn kuat "Horee...!". bukak lampu semula.
9. Pakai topi kertas. Bila dia balik, cakap "Selamat Datang ke McDonald. Boleh saya ambil pesanan anda..." Lepas tu buat muka bodoh, sambil berkata "Eh, kau rupanya..."
10. Kata kat roommate "Ada pesanan penting untuk kau". Lepas tu buat2 pengsan. Lepas 2-3 jam, bangun dan cakap yagn anda dah lupa pesanan tu. Kemudian, cakap "Eh...aku dah ingat". Lepas tu pengsan balik.
11. Bila roommate anda balik, berpura2 tengah telefon. Caci maki dan menjerit dengan kuat kat telefon tu. Lepas tu letak telefon dan cakap kat roommate bhw yg telefon tadi adalah mak dia. Cakap mak dia akan telefon balik.
12. Kalau roommate suka gosok gigi kat sinki, perhatikan sampai habis. Lepas dia habis, cakap dengan dia bhw anda kena ajar dia cara mengosok gigi dengan betul.
13. Edarkan risalah ke kawasan kedai/rumah kedai berdekatan rumah/kampus. Dalam risalah tu, nyatakan bahawa roommate anda hilang. Letak sekali gambar dia dlm risalah tu. Tawarkan hadiah kepada sesiapa yg menjumpai roommate anda.
14. Bila roommate anda tutup lampu pd sebelah malam, nyanyi lagu opera sekuat hati. Bila dia buka balik lampu, buat2 muka bodoh dan confused.
15. Duduk & renung roommate dlm 2-3 jam. Kalau boleh, bawa member2 sekali sambil makan kacang & popcorn. Buat macam tengah tengok wayang.
16. Masa roommate tiada, ambil deodoran dan sapukan pada seluruh dinding bilik. Bila dia balik, puji bahawa bilik berbau wangi. Lakukan selalu sampai deodoran tu habis.
17. Kalau roommate ada binatang peliharaan, spt kucing, offer utk beri makan kpd binatang tsbt. Cepat2 keluarkan botol gam atau minyak rambut sebelum dia beri persetujuan kpd kau.
18. Pegang & gosok-gosok rambut roommate anda sambil berkata "Rambut kau hitam, lurus dan berkilat la...Macam teknik rebonding...". Sekali-sekala buat masa dia tengah tidur.
19. Mase roommate tido, bungkus dia macam kafan mayat (siap ikat), pastu panggil member dlm 10 bace yasin ramai2. bile rumet jage pakat2 buat x nmpk ape2.
20. Sebelum roommate balik dari kelas, bungkus diri sendiri macam kafan (siap ikat jugak) pastu baring senyap-senyap atas katil dia. Mesti dia terkujat sampai pengsan bila masuk bilik tengok2 ada mayat.
hehe..try lah...
1. Setiap hari Jumaat, pack segala barang anda dan bagitau kat roommate anda nak balik kampung. Selepas sejam, balik ke bilik & terangkan bhw takde org kat rumah. Unpack segala brg anda & pegi tidor.
2. Setiap kali roommate anda balik, jerit sekuat hati" horee...kau dah balik". Lepas tu menari dlm 5 minit. Lepas tu, tenung jam lama2 dan tanya dia "Sepatutnya kau dah blah dah skrg"
3. Buat2 terjaga pd tengah malam, jerit kuat2 " Tolong, kat mana aku berada ni?" dan lari keliling bilik tu. Kalau bilik kecil, cukuplah sekadar melompat 2-3 kali. Kemudian, sambung tidor. Esoknya, kalo dia tanya, pura2 tak tahu apa yg dia cakap.
4. Ambil marker, buat bulatan kecil kat lengan anda. Besarkan bulatan tu setiap hari sambil berkata "Dah merebak... dah merebak!"
5. Beli pepokok bonsai. Bercakap & tidor dengan pokok tu setiap hari. Selepas seminggu, bertengkar dgn pokok tu dan cakap "Aku tak boleh hidup sebilik dengan kau lagi" sambil keluar & menghempaskan pintu bilik dgn kuat...Buang pokok tu tapi biarkan pasu kat situ.
6. Beli pisau banyak-banyak. Tajamkan setiap malam sambil merenung roommate anda sambil berkata "Tak lama lagi...tak lama lagi..."
7. Duduk didepan papan chess dua-tiga jam tanpa buat apa2 atau cakap apa2. Lepas tu bangun secara tiba2 sambil berkata, "Siot betul, kalah lagi"
8. Setiap kali roommate balik, tutup lampu dan tidor. lepas dia keluar, bangun dan menjerit dgn kuat "Horee...!". bukak lampu semula.
9. Pakai topi kertas. Bila dia balik, cakap "Selamat Datang ke McDonald. Boleh saya ambil pesanan anda..." Lepas tu buat muka bodoh, sambil berkata "Eh, kau rupanya..."
10. Kata kat roommate "Ada pesanan penting untuk kau". Lepas tu buat2 pengsan. Lepas 2-3 jam, bangun dan cakap yagn anda dah lupa pesanan tu. Kemudian, cakap "Eh...aku dah ingat". Lepas tu pengsan balik.
11. Bila roommate anda balik, berpura2 tengah telefon. Caci maki dan menjerit dengan kuat kat telefon tu. Lepas tu letak telefon dan cakap kat roommate bhw yg telefon tadi adalah mak dia. Cakap mak dia akan telefon balik.
12. Kalau roommate suka gosok gigi kat sinki, perhatikan sampai habis. Lepas dia habis, cakap dengan dia bhw anda kena ajar dia cara mengosok gigi dengan betul.
13. Edarkan risalah ke kawasan kedai/rumah kedai berdekatan rumah/kampus. Dalam risalah tu, nyatakan bahawa roommate anda hilang. Letak sekali gambar dia dlm risalah tu. Tawarkan hadiah kepada sesiapa yg menjumpai roommate anda.
14. Bila roommate anda tutup lampu pd sebelah malam, nyanyi lagu opera sekuat hati. Bila dia buka balik lampu, buat2 muka bodoh dan confused.
15. Duduk & renung roommate dlm 2-3 jam. Kalau boleh, bawa member2 sekali sambil makan kacang & popcorn. Buat macam tengah tengok wayang.
16. Masa roommate tiada, ambil deodoran dan sapukan pada seluruh dinding bilik. Bila dia balik, puji bahawa bilik berbau wangi. Lakukan selalu sampai deodoran tu habis.
17. Kalau roommate ada binatang peliharaan, spt kucing, offer utk beri makan kpd binatang tsbt. Cepat2 keluarkan botol gam atau minyak rambut sebelum dia beri persetujuan kpd kau.
18. Pegang & gosok-gosok rambut roommate anda sambil berkata "Rambut kau hitam, lurus dan berkilat la...Macam teknik rebonding...". Sekali-sekala buat masa dia tengah tidur.
19. Mase roommate tido, bungkus dia macam kafan mayat (siap ikat), pastu panggil member dlm 10 bace yasin ramai2. bile rumet jage pakat2 buat x nmpk ape2.
20. Sebelum roommate balik dari kelas, bungkus diri sendiri macam kafan (siap ikat jugak) pastu baring senyap-senyap atas katil dia. Mesti dia terkujat sampai pengsan bila masuk bilik tengok2 ada mayat.
hehe..try lah...
i do stupid things 47% of the time.. sparuh tu haha..
Mark which things you have done, then calculate your score by counting the number of questions you marked. This test is out of 100 questions which means that the number you get as your score is also your percentage. Tag some of your friends, and re-post as "I do stupid things __% of the time."
(beware this may make you feel very stupid)
1. [ ] Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out
2. [] Gotten your head stuck between the stair rails
3. [] Broken a chair by leaning back in it
4. [x] Had gum fall out of your mouth while you were talking
5. [x] Choked on your own spit while you were talking
6. [] Had people tell you that you are blonde when you're not, or had people tell you that your blonde highlights are going to your head
7. [x] Been caught staring at your crush by your crush
8. [x] Have looked for something for at least 5 min then realized it was in your hand
9. [x] Tried to push open a door that said pull
10. [x] Tried to pull open a door that said push (this is bull, if we've done one, we've done the other)
Running total: 6
11. [ ] Have actually believed someone when they said that they knew how to make a love-potion
12. [] Have hit yourself in the process of trying to hit something else
13. [x] Have tripped and fallen UP the stairs
14. [ ] Have actually exploded marshmallows in the microwave
15. [ ] Have gotten gum stuck in your hair
16. [ ] Had gum fall out of your mouth while trying to blow a bubble
17. [X ] Have had the juice from a mini tomato squirt out and hit somebody else when you bit into it
18. [ X] Have had your drink come out your nose because you were laughing so hard
19. [x] Have called one of your good friends by the wrong name
20. [] Have skinned your toe because you were playing soccer or kickball with flip flops on or you were barefoot
Running total: 10
21. [ ] Have put a sticker on your forehead, forgot it was there, and went out in public with it on-ddnt forget, i knew it.
22. [X ] Have fallen out of a moving vehicle
23. [x] Have run into a closed door- it was well clean glass
25. [ ] Searched for your cell phone while you were talking on it- i have 2 duh.
26. [x] It has taken you longer than 5 min to get a joke
27. [ ] Have gotten your hair stuck in a blow dryer
28. [ ] Have gotten your hair stuck in a fan
29. [ X] Tripped on a crack in the sidewalk
30. [ ] Said o'clock after saying how many min after the hour, example: 5:30 o'clock, or 6:15 o'clock
Running total: 14
31. [ ] After someone told you that there was gum on the ground, you stepped in it
32. [ ] Put on a white shirt even though you already knew it was raining outside
33. [x]Have ever walked up to a stranger because you thought they were someone else
34. [ ] Ever been kicked out of a grocery store/off their property
35. [x] Touched the stove, the curling iron, a hot pan, etc when its on, even though you knew it was hot
36. [X ] Taken off your clothes to change into something else then accidentally put the old clothes back on
37. [X] Wondered why something wasn't working then realized it wasn't plugged in
38. [X ] Put the cereal in the fridge, or put the milk in the cupboard
39. [] Walked into a pole
40. [] Wore two different earrings or shoes by accident/stolen someones shoes by accident
Running total: 19
41. [x] Put your shirt on backwards/inside-out without realizing it then left your house
42. [ ] Tried to take a picture of someone's eye with the flash on
43. [x] Gotten a ring stuck on your finger because you put it on even though you knew it was too small
44. [] Walked out of the bathroom (stall) with toilet paper stuck to your shoe without realizing it
45. [x] Went to go do something/go get something, then when you got there, you forgot what it is was that you were going to do
46. [X] Picked up someone else's drink and drank out of it by accident when your drink was right next to it-smoked someones fags.
47. [] Fallen out of your chair while trying to pick something up
48. [X ] Have poked yourself in the eye
49. [ ] Have gotten in the shower with your socks still on
50. [ ] Melted your hairbrush while blow drying your hair
Running total: 24
51. [x] Have done enough stupid things to take this test
52. [X] Have accidentally stabbed yourself with a pencil
53. [x] Have sung the wrong verse to a song without realizing it
54. [x] Have given an odd answer to a question because you didn't hear the question in the first place and didn't feel like asking what it was
55. [] Told someone you were the wrong age because you seriously forgot how old you were
56. [ ] Looked into an overhead purposefully while it was on
57. [X] Got up early and got ready for school/work, then realized that you didn't have school/work that day
58. [] Forgot your own phone number
59. [ ] Have tripped on a cord after someone told you to watch out for it
60. [x] Have ever laughed at a joke that no one else thought was funny (thats not stupid, justt a unique sense of humour)
Running total: 27
61. [] Done the Macarena to the electric slide or vice versa
62. [] Said 'funner' then had someone make fun of you for it
63. [x] Have repeated yourself at least twice in the same sentence
64. [X ] Brought up an inside joke with the wrong person
65. [ X] Didn't do the backside of an assignment because you thought that there wasn't one because you had already looked and forgot that there was another side
66. [ X] Did more work than you had to on an assignment because you didn't read the directions
67. [X] Corrected someone's grammar/pronunciation then figured out that you were the one that was wrong
68. [x] Put something in a special place so that you would remember where it was, then forgot where you put it
69. [x] Put ice in your drink after the glass was full of liquid and had it splash out
70. [ ] Told a lie then forgot what it was that you had said and got caught
Running total: 35
71. [] When wearing goggles, you pulled them away from your face and let go so that they would come back and snap you in the face
72. [ ] Forgot to make sure that the lamp was off before you replaced the light bulb
73. [X ] Ran into a door jam
74. [] Told someone that you hardly ever do stupid things, then immediately did/said something stupid
75. [] Told someone to watch out for something, then you were the one that ran into it
76. [ ] Have licked playground sand -ate it, duh!
77. [x] Have purposely and repeatedly flicked yourself with a rubber band- had the coolest welts
78. [x] Gotten so hyper that someone actually thought you were drunk/high when you weren't
79. [x] Have been so hyper you actually scared people
80. [ ] Put duct tape on your body then pulled it off to see if it would hurt
Running total: 39
81. [ ] Put tape on your hair/someone else's hair then pulled it off
82. [ ] Put a clothes pin/hair clip on your lip, figured out that it hurt, then did it again
83. [X ] Sat and wondered why women's dress shirts have a loop on the back
84. [x] Made up a code name for someone so that you could talk about them to someone else and no one else would know who you were talking about
85. []Have gotten a hairbrush stuck in your hair (messy hair?)
86. [] Used the straw to blow the straw wrapper at someone
87. [x] Laughed out loud in the middle of class over something you just thought up in your head
88. [ ] When at a restaurant, you used your spoon to fling stuff at people
89. [ ] Have flung forks/spoons at people in a restaurant
90. [ ] Tripped and made the waiter drop the food.
Running total: 42
91. [ ] As you are writing, you move your head back and forth with your pen/pencil
92. [] Have drawn finger puppets on your fingers then named them (again, genius rather than stupid)
93. [ ] Have wrapped someone in a roll of toilet paper-duct tape
94. [ ] Have used somebody else's toothbrush without even realizing it wasn't yours- oh drunk mornings
95. [x] Have started telling a story and forget what you were talking about or what happened in the story
96. [x] Read a whole book but during the whole book you weren’t even paying attention
97. [x] You have spelled your own name wrong before
98. [x] Got your finger stuck in a door
99. [x] Have used your calculator as a form of communication in class - oh how I love ti84s (:
100. [ ] Have popped a balloon in your mouth
(beware this may make you feel very stupid)
1. [ ] Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out
2. [] Gotten your head stuck between the stair rails
3. [] Broken a chair by leaning back in it
4. [x] Had gum fall out of your mouth while you were talking
5. [x] Choked on your own spit while you were talking
6. [] Had people tell you that you are blonde when you're not, or had people tell you that your blonde highlights are going to your head
7. [x] Been caught staring at your crush by your crush
8. [x] Have looked for something for at least 5 min then realized it was in your hand
9. [x] Tried to push open a door that said pull
10. [x] Tried to pull open a door that said push (this is bull, if we've done one, we've done the other)
Running total: 6
11. [ ] Have actually believed someone when they said that they knew how to make a love-potion
12. [] Have hit yourself in the process of trying to hit something else
13. [x] Have tripped and fallen UP the stairs
14. [ ] Have actually exploded marshmallows in the microwave
15. [ ] Have gotten gum stuck in your hair
16. [ ] Had gum fall out of your mouth while trying to blow a bubble
17. [X ] Have had the juice from a mini tomato squirt out and hit somebody else when you bit into it
18. [ X] Have had your drink come out your nose because you were laughing so hard
19. [x] Have called one of your good friends by the wrong name
20. [] Have skinned your toe because you were playing soccer or kickball with flip flops on or you were barefoot
Running total: 10
21. [ ] Have put a sticker on your forehead, forgot it was there, and went out in public with it on-ddnt forget, i knew it.
22. [X ] Have fallen out of a moving vehicle
23. [x] Have run into a closed door- it was well clean glass
25. [ ] Searched for your cell phone while you were talking on it- i have 2 duh.
26. [x] It has taken you longer than 5 min to get a joke
27. [ ] Have gotten your hair stuck in a blow dryer
28. [ ] Have gotten your hair stuck in a fan
29. [ X] Tripped on a crack in the sidewalk
30. [ ] Said o'clock after saying how many min after the hour, example: 5:30 o'clock, or 6:15 o'clock
Running total: 14
31. [ ] After someone told you that there was gum on the ground, you stepped in it
32. [ ] Put on a white shirt even though you already knew it was raining outside
33. [x]Have ever walked up to a stranger because you thought they were someone else
34. [ ] Ever been kicked out of a grocery store/off their property
35. [x] Touched the stove, the curling iron, a hot pan, etc when its on, even though you knew it was hot
36. [X ] Taken off your clothes to change into something else then accidentally put the old clothes back on
37. [X] Wondered why something wasn't working then realized it wasn't plugged in
38. [X ] Put the cereal in the fridge, or put the milk in the cupboard
39. [] Walked into a pole
40. [] Wore two different earrings or shoes by accident/stolen someones shoes by accident
Running total: 19
41. [x] Put your shirt on backwards/inside-out without realizing it then left your house
42. [ ] Tried to take a picture of someone's eye with the flash on
43. [x] Gotten a ring stuck on your finger because you put it on even though you knew it was too small
44. [] Walked out of the bathroom (stall) with toilet paper stuck to your shoe without realizing it
45. [x] Went to go do something/go get something, then when you got there, you forgot what it is was that you were going to do
46. [X] Picked up someone else's drink and drank out of it by accident when your drink was right next to it-smoked someones fags.
47. [] Fallen out of your chair while trying to pick something up
48. [X ] Have poked yourself in the eye
49. [ ] Have gotten in the shower with your socks still on
50. [ ] Melted your hairbrush while blow drying your hair
Running total: 24
51. [x] Have done enough stupid things to take this test
52. [X] Have accidentally stabbed yourself with a pencil
53. [x] Have sung the wrong verse to a song without realizing it
54. [x] Have given an odd answer to a question because you didn't hear the question in the first place and didn't feel like asking what it was
55. [] Told someone you were the wrong age because you seriously forgot how old you were
56. [ ] Looked into an overhead purposefully while it was on
57. [X] Got up early and got ready for school/work, then realized that you didn't have school/work that day
58. [] Forgot your own phone number
59. [ ] Have tripped on a cord after someone told you to watch out for it
60. [x] Have ever laughed at a joke that no one else thought was funny (thats not stupid, justt a unique sense of humour)
Running total: 27
61. [] Done the Macarena to the electric slide or vice versa
62. [] Said 'funner' then had someone make fun of you for it
63. [x] Have repeated yourself at least twice in the same sentence
64. [X ] Brought up an inside joke with the wrong person
65. [ X] Didn't do the backside of an assignment because you thought that there wasn't one because you had already looked and forgot that there was another side
66. [ X] Did more work than you had to on an assignment because you didn't read the directions
67. [X] Corrected someone's grammar/pronunciation then figured out that you were the one that was wrong
68. [x] Put something in a special place so that you would remember where it was, then forgot where you put it
69. [x] Put ice in your drink after the glass was full of liquid and had it splash out
70. [ ] Told a lie then forgot what it was that you had said and got caught
Running total: 35
71. [] When wearing goggles, you pulled them away from your face and let go so that they would come back and snap you in the face
72. [ ] Forgot to make sure that the lamp was off before you replaced the light bulb
73. [X ] Ran into a door jam
74. [] Told someone that you hardly ever do stupid things, then immediately did/said something stupid
75. [] Told someone to watch out for something, then you were the one that ran into it
76. [ ] Have licked playground sand -ate it, duh!
77. [x] Have purposely and repeatedly flicked yourself with a rubber band- had the coolest welts
78. [x] Gotten so hyper that someone actually thought you were drunk/high when you weren't
79. [x] Have been so hyper you actually scared people
80. [ ] Put duct tape on your body then pulled it off to see if it would hurt
Running total: 39
81. [ ] Put tape on your hair/someone else's hair then pulled it off
82. [ ] Put a clothes pin/hair clip on your lip, figured out that it hurt, then did it again
83. [X ] Sat and wondered why women's dress shirts have a loop on the back
84. [x] Made up a code name for someone so that you could talk about them to someone else and no one else would know who you were talking about
85. []Have gotten a hairbrush stuck in your hair (messy hair?)
86. [] Used the straw to blow the straw wrapper at someone
87. [x] Laughed out loud in the middle of class over something you just thought up in your head
88. [ ] When at a restaurant, you used your spoon to fling stuff at people
89. [ ] Have flung forks/spoons at people in a restaurant
90. [ ] Tripped and made the waiter drop the food.
Running total: 42
91. [ ] As you are writing, you move your head back and forth with your pen/pencil
92. [] Have drawn finger puppets on your fingers then named them (again, genius rather than stupid)
93. [ ] Have wrapped someone in a roll of toilet paper-duct tape
94. [ ] Have used somebody else's toothbrush without even realizing it wasn't yours- oh drunk mornings
95. [x] Have started telling a story and forget what you were talking about or what happened in the story
96. [x] Read a whole book but during the whole book you weren’t even paying attention
97. [x] You have spelled your own name wrong before
98. [x] Got your finger stuck in a door
99. [x] Have used your calculator as a form of communication in class - oh how I love ti84s (:
100. [ ] Have popped a balloon in your mouth
Value Of Time..
Read it quietly, then pass it around if you may~
To realize
The value of a sister/brother
Ask someone
Who doesn't have one.
To realize
The value of ten years:
Ask a newly
Divorced couple.
To realize
The value of four years:
Ask a graduate.
To realize
The value of one year:
Ask a student who
Has failed a final exam.
To realize
The value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a stillborn.
To realize
The value of one month:
Ask a mother
Who has given birth to
A premature baby.
To realize
The value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.
To realize
The value of one minute:
Ask a person
Who has missed the train, bus or plane.
To realize
The value of one-second
Ask a person
Who has survived an accident.
Time waits for no one.
Treasure every moment you have.
You will treasure it even more when
You can share it with someone special.
To realize the value of a friend or family member:
LOSE ONE.
Remember....
Hold on tight to the ones you love!
To realize
The value of a sister/brother
Ask someone
Who doesn't have one.
To realize
The value of ten years:
Ask a newly
Divorced couple.
To realize
The value of four years:
Ask a graduate.
To realize
The value of one year:
Ask a student who
Has failed a final exam.
To realize
The value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a stillborn.
To realize
The value of one month:
Ask a mother
Who has given birth to
A premature baby.
To realize
The value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.
To realize
The value of one minute:
Ask a person
Who has missed the train, bus or plane.
To realize
The value of one-second
Ask a person
Who has survived an accident.
Time waits for no one.
Treasure every moment you have.
You will treasure it even more when
You can share it with someone special.
To realize the value of a friend or family member:
LOSE ONE.
Remember....
Hold on tight to the ones you love!
Buat Pedoman Semua..
Baca-bacakan, renung-renungkan, lu pikir la sendiri~
(meski aku bukanlah seislamik mana, namun amik ni buat pedoman bersama~)
Seorang guru wanita sedang bersemangat mengajarkan sesuatu kepada
murid-muridnya. Ia duduk menghadap murid-muridnya.
Di tangan kirinya ada kapur, di tangan kanannya ada pemadam.Guru itu
berkata, "Saya ada satu permainan... Caranya begini, ditangan kiri
saya ada
kapur, di tangan kanan ada pemadam. Jika saya angkat kapur ini, maka
berserulah "Kapur!", jika saya angkat pemadam ini, maka
katalah "Pemadam!"
Murid-muridnya pun mengerti dan mengikuti. Guru berganti-gantian
mengangkat antara kanan dan kiri tangannya, semakin lama semakin
cepat.
Beberapa saat kemudian guru kembali berkata, "Baik, sekarang
perhatikan.
Jika saya angkat kapur, maka sebutlah "Pemadam!", jika saya angkat
pemadam,
maka katakanlah "Kapur!". Dan diulangkan seperti tadi,tentu saja
murid-murid tadi keliru dan kekok, dan sangat sukar untuk
mengubahnya..
Namun lambat laun, mereka sudah biasa dan tidak lagi kekok. Selang
beberapa
saat, permainan berhenti.Sang guru tersenyum kepada murid-muridnya.
"Murid-murid, begitulah kita ummat Islam. Mulanya yang haq itu
haq,yang
bathil itu bathil. Kita begitu jelas membezakannya. Namun kemudian,
musuh-musuh kita memaksakan kepada kita dengan perbagai cara, untuk
menukarkan
sesuatu, dari yang haq menjadi bathil, dan sebaliknya. Pertama-tama
mungkin
akan sukar bagi kita menerima hal tersebut, tapi kerana terus
disosialisasikan dengan cara-cara menarik oleh mereka, akhirnya
lambat laun
kamu akan terbiasa dengan hal itu. Dan anda mulai dapat mengikutinya.
Musuh-musuh kamu tidak pernah berhenti membalik dan menukar nilai
dan
etika. "Keluar berduaan, berkasih-kasihan tidak lagi sesuatu yang
pelik,
Zina tidak lagi jadi persoalan, pakaian seksi menjadi hal yang
lumrah, sex
sebelum nikah
menjadi suatu hiburan dan trend, materialistik kini menjadi
suatu gaya hidup dan lain lain." "Semuanya sudah terbalik. Dan tanpa
disedari, anda sedikit demi sedikit menerimanya. Paham?" tanya Guru
kepada
murid-muridnya.. "Paham cikgu..."
"Baik permainan kedua..." begitu Guru melanjutkan..
"Cikgu ada Qur'an,cikgu akan letakkannya di tengah karpet. Sekarang
anda
berdiri diluar karpet. Permainannya adalah, bagaimana caranya
mengambil
Qur'an yang ada ditengah tanpa memijak karpet?"
Murid-muridnya berpikir . Ada yang mencuba alternatif dengan
tongkat, dan
lain-lain.
Akhirnya Guru memberikan jalan keluar, digulungnya karpet, dan ia
ambil
Qur'an. Ia
memenuhi syarat, tidak memijak karpet.
"Murid-murid, begitulah ummat Islam dan musuh-musuhnya. ..Musuh-musuh
Islam
tidak akan
memijak-mijak anda dengan terang-terang. ..Kerana tentu anda akan
menolaknya
mentah mentah. Orang biasapun tak akan rela kalau Islam dihina
dihadapan
mereka. Tapi mereka akan menggulung anda perlahan-lahan dari
pinggir,
sehingga anda tidak sedar."
Jika seseorang ingin membuat rumah yang kuat, maka dibina tapak yang
kuat.
Begitulah Islam, jika ingin kuat, maka bangunlah aqidah yang kuat.
Sebaliknya, jika ingin membongkar rumah, tentu susah kalau dimulai
dgn
tapaknya dulu, tentu saja hiasan-hiasan dinding akan dikeluarkan
dulu,
kerusi dipindahkan dulu, Almari dibuang dulu satu persatu, baru rumah
dihancurkan. .." "Begitulah musuh-musuh Islam menghancurkan kita. Ia
tidak
akan menghentam terang-terangan, tapi ia akan perlahan-lahan
meletihkan
anda. Mulai dari perangai anda, cara hidup, pakaian dan lain-lain,
sehingga
meskipun anda muslim, tapi anda telah meninggalkan ajaran Islam dan
mengikuti cara yang mereka... Dan itulah yang mereka inginkan."
"Ini semua adalah fenomena Ghazwul Fikri (Perang Pemikiran). Dan
inilah
yang dijalankan oleh musuh musuh kita... "Kenapa mereka tidak berani
terang-terang memijak-mijak cikgu?" tanya mereka."Sesungguhny a dahulu
mereka terang-terang menyerang, misalnya Perang Salib,Perang Tartar,
dan
lain-lain.
Tapi sekarang tidak lagi." "Begitulah Islam... Kalau diserang
perlahan-lahan,
mereka tidak akan sedar, akhirnya hancur. Tapi kalau diserang
serentak
terang-terangan,
mereka akan bangkit serentak, baru mereka akan sedar."
"Kalau begitu, kita selesaikan pelajaran kita kali ini, dan mari
kita
berdoa dahulu sebelum pulang..."
Matahari bersinar terik tatkala anak-anak itu keluar meninggalkan
tempat
belajar mereka dengan
pikiran masing-masing di kepalanya...
(meski aku bukanlah seislamik mana, namun amik ni buat pedoman bersama~)
Seorang guru wanita sedang bersemangat mengajarkan sesuatu kepada
murid-muridnya. Ia duduk menghadap murid-muridnya.
Di tangan kirinya ada kapur, di tangan kanannya ada pemadam.Guru itu
berkata, "Saya ada satu permainan... Caranya begini, ditangan kiri
saya ada
kapur, di tangan kanan ada pemadam. Jika saya angkat kapur ini, maka
berserulah "Kapur!", jika saya angkat pemadam ini, maka
katalah "Pemadam!"
Murid-muridnya pun mengerti dan mengikuti. Guru berganti-gantian
mengangkat antara kanan dan kiri tangannya, semakin lama semakin
cepat.
Beberapa saat kemudian guru kembali berkata, "Baik, sekarang
perhatikan.
Jika saya angkat kapur, maka sebutlah "Pemadam!", jika saya angkat
pemadam,
maka katakanlah "Kapur!". Dan diulangkan seperti tadi,tentu saja
murid-murid tadi keliru dan kekok, dan sangat sukar untuk
mengubahnya..
Namun lambat laun, mereka sudah biasa dan tidak lagi kekok. Selang
beberapa
saat, permainan berhenti.Sang guru tersenyum kepada murid-muridnya.
"Murid-murid, begitulah kita ummat Islam. Mulanya yang haq itu
haq,yang
bathil itu bathil. Kita begitu jelas membezakannya. Namun kemudian,
musuh-musuh kita memaksakan kepada kita dengan perbagai cara, untuk
menukarkan
sesuatu, dari yang haq menjadi bathil, dan sebaliknya. Pertama-tama
mungkin
akan sukar bagi kita menerima hal tersebut, tapi kerana terus
disosialisasikan dengan cara-cara menarik oleh mereka, akhirnya
lambat laun
kamu akan terbiasa dengan hal itu. Dan anda mulai dapat mengikutinya.
Musuh-musuh kamu tidak pernah berhenti membalik dan menukar nilai
dan
etika. "Keluar berduaan, berkasih-kasihan tidak lagi sesuatu yang
pelik,
Zina tidak lagi jadi persoalan, pakaian seksi menjadi hal yang
lumrah, sex
sebelum nikah
menjadi suatu hiburan dan trend, materialistik kini menjadi
suatu gaya hidup dan lain lain." "Semuanya sudah terbalik. Dan tanpa
disedari, anda sedikit demi sedikit menerimanya. Paham?" tanya Guru
kepada
murid-muridnya.. "Paham cikgu..."
"Baik permainan kedua..." begitu Guru melanjutkan..
"Cikgu ada Qur'an,cikgu akan letakkannya di tengah karpet. Sekarang
anda
berdiri diluar karpet. Permainannya adalah, bagaimana caranya
mengambil
Qur'an yang ada ditengah tanpa memijak karpet?"
Murid-muridnya berpikir . Ada yang mencuba alternatif dengan
tongkat, dan
lain-lain.
Akhirnya Guru memberikan jalan keluar, digulungnya karpet, dan ia
ambil
Qur'an. Ia
memenuhi syarat, tidak memijak karpet.
"Murid-murid, begitulah ummat Islam dan musuh-musuhnya. ..Musuh-musuh
Islam
tidak akan
memijak-mijak anda dengan terang-terang. ..Kerana tentu anda akan
menolaknya
mentah mentah. Orang biasapun tak akan rela kalau Islam dihina
dihadapan
mereka. Tapi mereka akan menggulung anda perlahan-lahan dari
pinggir,
sehingga anda tidak sedar."
Jika seseorang ingin membuat rumah yang kuat, maka dibina tapak yang
kuat.
Begitulah Islam, jika ingin kuat, maka bangunlah aqidah yang kuat.
Sebaliknya, jika ingin membongkar rumah, tentu susah kalau dimulai
dgn
tapaknya dulu, tentu saja hiasan-hiasan dinding akan dikeluarkan
dulu,
kerusi dipindahkan dulu, Almari dibuang dulu satu persatu, baru rumah
dihancurkan. .." "Begitulah musuh-musuh Islam menghancurkan kita. Ia
tidak
akan menghentam terang-terangan, tapi ia akan perlahan-lahan
meletihkan
anda. Mulai dari perangai anda, cara hidup, pakaian dan lain-lain,
sehingga
meskipun anda muslim, tapi anda telah meninggalkan ajaran Islam dan
mengikuti cara yang mereka... Dan itulah yang mereka inginkan."
"Ini semua adalah fenomena Ghazwul Fikri (Perang Pemikiran). Dan
inilah
yang dijalankan oleh musuh musuh kita... "Kenapa mereka tidak berani
terang-terang memijak-mijak cikgu?" tanya mereka."Sesungguhny a dahulu
mereka terang-terang menyerang, misalnya Perang Salib,Perang Tartar,
dan
lain-lain.
Tapi sekarang tidak lagi." "Begitulah Islam... Kalau diserang
perlahan-lahan,
mereka tidak akan sedar, akhirnya hancur. Tapi kalau diserang
serentak
terang-terangan,
mereka akan bangkit serentak, baru mereka akan sedar."
"Kalau begitu, kita selesaikan pelajaran kita kali ini, dan mari
kita
berdoa dahulu sebelum pulang..."
Matahari bersinar terik tatkala anak-anak itu keluar meninggalkan
tempat
belajar mereka dengan
pikiran masing-masing di kepalanya...
Sunday, January 10, 2010
I screwed up 72% of my teenage life~ so what?
tick where you had done when u were (or still am) a teenager~
[] Kissed someone before dating
[x] Gotten a phone taken away at school
[ ] Gotten caught chewing gum
[x] Gotten caught cheating on a test
Total so far: 2
[x] Arrived late to class more than 5 times
[x] Didn't do homework over 5 times
[x] Turned at least 2 projects in late
[x] Missed school just because you didn't feel like going
[ ] Laughed so loud you got kicked out of class
Total so far: 6
[x] Got your mom, dad, etc to get you out of school
[x] Text people during class
[x] Passed notes
[x] Threw stuff across the room
[x] Laughed at the teacher
Total so far: 11
[x] Took pictures during school hours
[x] Called someone during school hours
[x] Listened to iPod,CD,etc during school hours
Total so far: 14
[ ] Threw something at the teacher
[x] Went outside the classroom without permission
[x] Broke the dress code
[x] Failed a class-progress report
[x] Ate food during class
Total so far: 18
[ ] Gotten a call from school
[ ] Been called the worst student
[ ] Punished on a school trip because you behaved badly
[x] Didn't take your stuff to school
[ ] Given a teacher the finger when they weren't looking
Total so far: 19
[x] Faked your parents signature
[x] Slept in class
[x] Cursed at your teacher behind their back
[x] Copied homework
[x] Got in trouble with the principal/vice principal
[ ] Thrown food in the lunch room
Total so far: 24
Multiply by 3
Post as "i screwed up_ _% of my teenage life."
How much of your teenage life have you screwed up
[x] Gotten a phone taken away at school
[ ] Gotten caught chewing gum
[x] Gotten caught cheating on a test
Total so far: 2
[x] Arrived late to class more than 5 times
[x] Didn't do homework over 5 times
[x] Turned at least 2 projects in late
[x] Missed school just because you didn't feel like going
[ ] Laughed so loud you got kicked out of class
Total so far: 6
[x] Got your mom, dad, etc to get you out of school
[x] Text people during class
[x] Passed notes
[x] Threw stuff across the room
[x] Laughed at the teacher
Total so far: 11
[x] Took pictures during school hours
[x] Called someone during school hours
[x] Listened to iPod,CD,etc during school hours
Total so far: 14
[ ] Threw something at the teacher
[x] Went outside the classroom without permission
[x] Broke the dress code
[x] Failed a class-progress report
[x] Ate food during class
Total so far: 18
[ ] Gotten a call from school
[ ] Been called the worst student
[ ] Punished on a school trip because you behaved badly
[x] Didn't take your stuff to school
[ ] Given a teacher the finger when they weren't looking
Total so far: 19
[x] Faked your parents signature
[x] Slept in class
[x] Cursed at your teacher behind their back
[x] Copied homework
[x] Got in trouble with the principal/vice principal
[ ] Thrown food in the lunch room
Total so far: 24
Multiply by 3
Post as "i screwed up_ _% of my teenage life."
How much of your teenage life have you screwed up
A dose of "forget"
Dedicated to myself n all those who are (or was) heartbroken~
n credits to yana again~
Do not think of him
And your love will dim.
You might suffer for now
But sadness WILL take a bow.
Heart broken bleeds red.
Tears continue to be shed.
Then..
One day when you least expect
Your heart will again correct.
Throbs no more when we meet
Able to smile at you so sweet.
My heart is once again mine
No longer with yours intertwined.
Corners of your heart are not empty
I can see she occupies it completely.
A hitch in your breath;
A skip of your heart;
Whenever she's near.
Just like mine once did my dear..
Now I fly you a goodbye kiss.
May it keep u safe and let danger amiss.
With her you share your love and weaknesses
So now my love..
I pray for your happiness..
n credits to yana again~
Do not think of him
And your love will dim.
You might suffer for now
But sadness WILL take a bow.
Heart broken bleeds red.
Tears continue to be shed.
Then..
One day when you least expect
Your heart will again correct.
Throbs no more when we meet
Able to smile at you so sweet.
My heart is once again mine
No longer with yours intertwined.
Corners of your heart are not empty
I can see she occupies it completely.
A hitch in your breath;
A skip of your heart;
Whenever she's near.
Just like mine once did my dear..
Now I fly you a goodbye kiss.
May it keep u safe and let danger amiss.
With her you share your love and weaknesses
So now my love..
I pray for your happiness..
11 Signs you're in love..♥
(Credits to Yana~)
You walk really slow when you're with them.
TEN
You feel shy whenever they're around.
NINE
You smile when you hear their voice..
EIGHT
When you look at them, you can't see the other people around you, you just see him/her.
SIX
They're all you think about.
FIVE
You realize you're always smiling when you're looking at them.
FOUR
You would do anything for them, just to see them.
THREE
While reading this, there was one person on your mind this whole time.
TWO
You were so busy thinking about that person, you didn't notice number seven was missing
ONE
You just scrolled up to check & are now silently laughing at yourself.
----------------------------------
EXTRA SIGNS BY FANS (VERY GOOOOD ONES):
- You keep checking his/her facebook profile
- When all you do is wait for him/her to come online and when he/she does you get nervous!!
- When you find out they like someone else you feel like your heart is ripping
- Your heart skips a beat whenever they're online, even though you know you're not going to talk to them.
- When They Come Online You Just Stare At There Screen Name Thinking Should I Talk? Or Not?
- You daydream about things that could happen if you were together even though you know it is very unlikely to actually happen.
-If you catch them looking at you, smiling at you or when they talk to it makes you smile and you automatically think "maybe he likes me back..." and your heart skips a beat ♥
- You re-read their texts just so you get butterflies all over again.
this might be true, but nevertheless, ask your heart honestly whether he / she IS really the one..
You walk really slow when you're with them.
TEN
You feel shy whenever they're around.
NINE
You smile when you hear their voice..
EIGHT
When you look at them, you can't see the other people around you, you just see him/her.
SIX
They're all you think about.
FIVE
You realize you're always smiling when you're looking at them.
FOUR
You would do anything for them, just to see them.
THREE
While reading this, there was one person on your mind this whole time.
TWO
You were so busy thinking about that person, you didn't notice number seven was missing
ONE
You just scrolled up to check & are now silently laughing at yourself.
--------------------------
EXTRA SIGNS BY FANS (VERY GOOOOD ONES):
- You keep checking his/her facebook profile
- When all you do is wait for him/her to come online and when he/she does you get nervous!!
- When you find out they like someone else you feel like your heart is ripping
- Your heart skips a beat whenever they're online, even though you know you're not going to talk to them.
- When They Come Online You Just Stare At There Screen Name Thinking Should I Talk? Or Not?
- You daydream about things that could happen if you were together even though you know it is very unlikely to actually happen.
-If you catch them looking at you, smiling at you or when they talk to it makes you smile and you automatically think "maybe he likes me back..." and your heart skips a beat ♥
- You re-read their texts just so you get butterflies all over again.
this might be true, but nevertheless, ask your heart honestly whether he / she IS really the one..
Bermalam Di Katil Seorang Lelaki
(Terima kasih buat kak illyani atas cerita ini~)
Kisah berlaku waktu satu rombongan guru pelatih membuat rombongan ke tempat bersejarah. Bila sampai ke tempat yang dituju para guru pelatih mendapati tempat tersebut merupakan satu yang tidak pernah dikunjung oleh sesiapa...lengang, sepi!
Maka guru pelatih bermula turun untuk melihat kesan sejarah yang ada di tempat tersebut. Pada permulaan, mereka berkumpul bersama melihat kesan sejarah yang ada. Lebih kurang sejam selepas itu mereka berpecah menuju ke tempat sejarah yang mereka sukai.
Nak jadi cerita, seorang guru pelatih perempuan yang begitu tekun mencatit dan mengarang maklumat yang ada pada kesan sejarah tersebut, tanpa disedar,dah tertinggal.
Yang trainer pulak ingat semua cikgu-cikgu dah ada dalam bas, so mereka bertolak untuk balik.
Cikgu pelatih yang tertinggal tu mula gabra...menjerit sekuat hati, cemas giler panggil kawan-kawan dia dan pelatih yang lain. Tapi hampa.
So dia tekad berjalan nak keluar dari tempat berkenaan menuju ke kampung berdekatan. Sejam berjalan tetapi masih tidak menjumpai sesiapa. Startlah letih dan menangis panggil mak ayah.
Pusing pusing nampak satu pondok kecik berdekatan dengan tempat tu. so dia pegi ketuk pintu. Keluar seorang pemuda anggaran umur linkungan lewat 20an dan bertanya: siapa kamu? Jawablah cikgu tadi yang dia tertinggal bas rombongan, dan tak tahu nak pulang.
Berkatalah lelaki tadi bahawa tempat yang ingin ditujunya berletak di selatan dan tempat mereka berada di utara, dan tempat tu memang tak didiami sesiapa. Maka menangislah cikgu tadi bagai orang hilang akal...
Disebabkan kesian, lelaki tu menyuruh cikgu tadi bermalam dipondok dia je sementara tunggu subuh untuk di hantar pulang.
Cikgu tu disuruh tidur atas katil lelaki tersebut manakala lelaki itu tidur atas lantai berhamparkan kain je dan ambil sehelai kain lain digantung sebagai pengadang tempat tidur antara dia dan cikgu tu.
Lelaki tadi duduk dipenjuru pondok dan membaca buku. Yang cikgu tu tutup seluruh badan dia ngan kain gebar menahan menangis dek takut dan tak henti matanya mengawasi lelaki misteri tu.
Tiba-tiba lelaki tu tutup buku dan pergi kat lilin yang menyala dan membakar jarinya satu persatu.
Cikgu tadi apalagi, bertambah kecut perut takut kerana berfikir bahawa lelaki tersebut mengamalkan ilmu songsang.. mengeletar giler maut... Maka kedua-duanya tidak tidur sehingga pagi..
Bila menjelang pagi lelaki tersebut menghantar cikgu tadi ketempat asalnya.
Bila dah sampai rumah, cikgu tadi pun menceritakan apa yang terjadi kat mak bapak dia. Bapak cikgu tu dengan seribu satu persoalan mengesyaki sesuatu berlaku, sebab tengok anak dia nampak sakit, pucat lesi dan takut amatlah sangat.
Si bapa pun pergi ke tempat yang dimaksudkan anaknya tu. Menyamar sebagai pemburu yang tersesat dan bertanya tempat tuju. Dalam hati si bapa tadi hairan tengok jari jari tangan lelaki tadi berbalut dan bertanya kenapa...
So lelaki tu pun cerita bahawa dua malam lepas datang seorang perempuan cantik elok paras rupa untuk tumpang bermalam dipondok beliau. Dan sudah tentu pada ketika itu syaitan iblis sudah berada bersama mereka. Disebabkan takut terjadinya perkara yang tidak diingini berlaku, beliau membakar jarinya satu persatu supaya dapat menghindarkan diri dari berfikir memperkosa perempuan tersebut.
Mendengar penerangan lelaki tersebut si bapa mempelawa lelaki berbalut jari itu datang kerumahnya dan berhajat mengahwinkan anaknya kepada lelaki tersebut.., tanpa pengetahuan lelaki tu yang bahawasanya perempuan yang akan dikahwininya adalah perempuan yang menumpang tidur di katil nya 2 malam yang sudah...
MOTIF CERITA
Beruntunglah lelaki tersebut kerana menghindarkan diri dari melakukan benda haram satu malam, dan dia berjaya mendapat sesuatu yang indah dan halal seumur hidup...
So apa lagi yg lelaki....
kot kot ada awek tersesat..
bakar lah jari korang..
ADA BERANI?
Gerenti tak berani punya....
ambik kesempatan dalam kesempitan adalah.....
huahuahua..
sumber:http://bluevirgolady.blogspot.com/2010/01/bermalam-di-katil-seorg-lelaki.html
Maka guru pelatih bermula turun untuk melihat kesan sejarah yang ada di tempat tersebut. Pada permulaan, mereka berkumpul bersama melihat kesan sejarah yang ada. Lebih kurang sejam selepas itu mereka berpecah menuju ke tempat sejarah yang mereka sukai.
Nak jadi cerita, seorang guru pelatih perempuan yang begitu tekun mencatit dan mengarang maklumat yang ada pada kesan sejarah tersebut, tanpa disedar,dah tertinggal.
Yang trainer pulak ingat semua cikgu-cikgu dah ada dalam bas, so mereka bertolak untuk balik.
Cikgu pelatih yang tertinggal tu mula gabra...menjerit sekuat hati, cemas giler panggil kawan-kawan dia dan pelatih yang lain. Tapi hampa.
So dia tekad berjalan nak keluar dari tempat berkenaan menuju ke kampung berdekatan. Sejam berjalan tetapi masih tidak menjumpai sesiapa. Startlah letih dan menangis panggil mak ayah.
Pusing pusing nampak satu pondok kecik berdekatan dengan tempat tu. so dia pegi ketuk pintu. Keluar seorang pemuda anggaran umur linkungan lewat 20an dan bertanya: siapa kamu? Jawablah cikgu tadi yang dia tertinggal bas rombongan, dan tak tahu nak pulang.
Berkatalah lelaki tadi bahawa tempat yang ingin ditujunya berletak di selatan dan tempat mereka berada di utara, dan tempat tu memang tak didiami sesiapa. Maka menangislah cikgu tadi bagai orang hilang akal...
Disebabkan kesian, lelaki tu menyuruh cikgu tadi bermalam dipondok dia je sementara tunggu subuh untuk di hantar pulang.
Cikgu tu disuruh tidur atas katil lelaki tersebut manakala lelaki itu tidur atas lantai berhamparkan kain je dan ambil sehelai kain lain digantung sebagai pengadang tempat tidur antara dia dan cikgu tu.
Lelaki tadi duduk dipenjuru pondok dan membaca buku. Yang cikgu tu tutup seluruh badan dia ngan kain gebar menahan menangis dek takut dan tak henti matanya mengawasi lelaki misteri tu.
Tiba-tiba lelaki tu tutup buku dan pergi kat lilin yang menyala dan membakar jarinya satu persatu.
Cikgu tadi apalagi, bertambah kecut perut takut kerana berfikir bahawa lelaki tersebut mengamalkan ilmu songsang.. mengeletar giler maut... Maka kedua-duanya tidak tidur sehingga pagi..
Bila menjelang pagi lelaki tersebut menghantar cikgu tadi ketempat asalnya.
Bila dah sampai rumah, cikgu tadi pun menceritakan apa yang terjadi kat mak bapak dia. Bapak cikgu tu dengan seribu satu persoalan mengesyaki sesuatu berlaku, sebab tengok anak dia nampak sakit, pucat lesi dan takut amatlah sangat.
Si bapa pun pergi ke tempat yang dimaksudkan anaknya tu. Menyamar sebagai pemburu yang tersesat dan bertanya tempat tuju. Dalam hati si bapa tadi hairan tengok jari jari tangan lelaki tadi berbalut dan bertanya kenapa...
So lelaki tu pun cerita bahawa dua malam lepas datang seorang perempuan cantik elok paras rupa untuk tumpang bermalam dipondok beliau. Dan sudah tentu pada ketika itu syaitan iblis sudah berada bersama mereka. Disebabkan takut terjadinya perkara yang tidak diingini berlaku, beliau membakar jarinya satu persatu supaya dapat menghindarkan diri dari berfikir memperkosa perempuan tersebut.
Mendengar penerangan lelaki tersebut si bapa mempelawa lelaki berbalut jari itu datang kerumahnya dan berhajat mengahwinkan anaknya kepada lelaki tersebut.., tanpa pengetahuan lelaki tu yang bahawasanya perempuan yang akan dikahwininya adalah perempuan yang menumpang tidur di katil nya 2 malam yang sudah...
MOTIF CERITA
Beruntunglah lelaki tersebut kerana menghindarkan diri dari melakukan benda haram satu malam, dan dia berjaya mendapat sesuatu yang indah dan halal seumur hidup...
So apa lagi yg lelaki....
kot kot ada awek tersesat..
bakar lah jari korang..
ADA BERANI?
Gerenti tak berani punya....
ambik kesempatan dalam kesempitan adalah.....
huahuahua..
sumber:http://bluevirgolady.blogs
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