Tuesday, June 29, 2010

The Loneliest Day Ever :(

28th June.
Well, that's my birthday..
At least to those who really3 remembered it...

Today is (or was) 28 June, year 2010..
And it was on my semester holidays..
Unlike on previous years, I expected this time around, my birthday should be much more fun and enjoyable!
But it was not. :(

27th June, 9.00 pm.
I just realized it was my birthday tomorrow!
Well, I was expecting my birthday around the corner.. I was aware it was June!
But, how could I missed the exact date? Seeing the date on my laptop, then it got to my sense.. I'm 20 in a few hours! Damn.. :(
But no matter, I'll be count-downing that moment, what will be, will be!!
I was still chatting with few of my friends, surprisingly no one was aware of my countdown.. :(

28th June, 12.00 midnight.
People started to wish me Happy Birthday! I was happy!
Within the next 30 min, my wall was packed with wishes from various friends that I knew during the course of my life.. I was touched..

Despite that, no midnight surprises.. Oh well..

28th June, 1.00 am.
Okay.. Is it me, or my birthday wishes was the courtesy of Facebook?
Yeah, it was. Thanks to that, everyone in my friends list was reminded that today IS my birthday..
Oh well, at least few noticed that and bothered to greet me anyway..
So, credits to Facebook..

(hey, I'm guilty myself. So no harm done.)

28th June, 2.30 am.
A very best friend of mine from high school YM-ed me, and chatted with me for over an hour.. Not anything related to my birthday, but he was consulting me about his problem.. Being a good friend of his, I heard his problem and gave him a solution..
Thank goodness, I did have a solution to his problem. Case closed, and I'm glad to do goodness on my birthday.. (although he did not realize my birthday at all.)

28th June, 4.30 am.
My wall started to cool down, and so I decided to have a well-deserved nap..
Sweet dreams, may my day be a bliss!

28th June, 9.00 am.
I woke up, but the bed was too comfy.. Ah, another snooze, and I'll be fine~

28th June, 11.15 am.
Gosh! Overslept! But I was doing okay.. My mother called from work (no need to know what my mother's work anyway.. It's complicated), and so she asked me to get ready and we (me, father, her, and another person) can all go out in a moment..

28th June, 11.45 am.
Got my long beauty bath, and I was doing my hair, everything!
It's my birthday, and I should look good! I'm 20 today!
(Gosh. I am old. @___@ )
No matter.. I'm looking good~

28th June, 11.55 am.
This is the exact time when I was born.. (Yeah, I remembered most details in my birth cert..) But, no words from my mom..

28th June, 12.45 noon.
We're almost at Jaya Jusco Permas Jaya.
During a light conversation in the car (and that somebody else was driving, using the company's car) my mother suddenly remembered (read my words.. suddenly remembered) that it was my birthday.. Somehow she managed to get that detail from her memory.. Gosh.
Ok! At least she wished you. Fine.

28th June, 1.15 pm.
Mother decided to grab a bite at the Old Town White Coffee cafe..
Ok, I don't mind. We had toasts (yeah, toasts. boringgggggggggg)
During those bites, my parents was lecturing me about, everything!
"Have you started packing?" "Err, soon?" "OMG!! yep yep yep.."
"Careful driving!!! yep yep yep"
"I've looked your bank account, what have you been doing? yep yep yep"

Gosh. For god's sake, it's my birthday! They didn't took the effort to make me feel it was my birthday today. grrrrrr.

28th June, 1.45 pm.
My mom was doing the groceries around. (This is her work. Yeah, again. It's complicated.)
I was around and about, looking stuffs that I need to buy before I go back to my uni.
Sigh. Holiday's are almost over.
Alas, nothing was available.. (seriously, hypermarkets here, are not as diverse with products, as in KL.. but that nagging needs to hold. I've got bigger issues here..)
So, I got nothing for myself. None.

28th June, 2.15 pm.
I was supposed to follow my mother and continues grocery shopping at Cold Storage and somewhere else. That's my kind of outing with my mother. Seems boring, but this is the kind of outing that existed between us. huhu..

Unfortunately, my father has better ideas. I have to go to the bank. An errant that has to be done.
Sigh. Fine then.

28th June, 2.20 pm.
Mother dropped us off, and I drove with father to ___bank. Guess what I was supposed to do? Get a new account book. The previous one was already full, since I got it since 2005. #$^%$^%$^&*&%^$##.
Why today???? Any day but today????????? ^*&^&*%^&%*(**(.

28th June. 2.25 pm.
I was queuing for this bloody account book. The effing bloody account book.
Patience is virtue anyway. (is it? Not!!)
Why la these M'sians have to cut queue in the bank!
#$%^^&*&... Do I need to cope with this?
On my birthday?????

28th June. 3.00 pm.
I've wasted my birthday in the bank.
The bloody effing bank. With slowpoke services.
When I could enjoy it somewhere else. %&&%*(^&%^&...

28th June. 3.10 pm.
Home. Home bloody home.
I'm reaching my boiling point now.
I didn't bother to have lunch.

28th June. 3.11 pm.
Facebooking. Still, more wall posts coming in.
Seriously, did Facebook only noticed my birthday???
(I mean Facebook. Not my certain unconcerned friends.)

28th June. 4.00 pm.
My mother asked me to pick her up from work. Fine.
Drove down to her workplace, but what the heck?
Detour.. Got myself a topup (Still, my phone was as dead as a frozen fish. Just one or two person was still in contact.. grrrr..)
And to cheer myself up, I got myself a cool-blog! (that sweet drink with that wrapped thingy watsoeva n it got "pearls" inside the drink? yeah that.)

28th June. 4.20 pm.
Had a quick stop to a friend's place, she gave me few stuffs, and I gave her this new shirt that didn't fit me..
But then, mother called. Demanding me to pick her up at that instant.
God. *took a deeeeeep breath*

28th June. 4.30 pm.
Mother was yapping again. Commenting about my driving watsoeva.
(How could I drive well? I was fury.)
I am reaching my breaking point.
Why won't you realize it's your son's birthday????????????????

28th June. 4.31 pm.
Dozens of missed call from my father.
I can drive okay??????

28th June. 4.40 pm.
Reached home. No parking.
Squeezed the car somewhere in between. I couldn't care even more.
Mother just rushed in. She needs her lunch.
And I was left to drag all of these bloody groceries (that she got for home, separated from her work, you wouldn't know what I mean.)
My parents wouldn't even cared. I dragged everything in.
And as usual, heavy work = sweating like a pig. &(*&)(*)^&*%^*&....

28th June. 4.50 pm.
Dumped the whole lot in the kitchen.
Got into my room. Changed. Bathed. Facebooking.

28th June. 5.15 pm.
My mother couldn't stop bothering me for the day.
She yapped about something. But I can't take it anymore.
If it's a normal day. Fine. Put up with it.
But today was wayyyyyyyyy to much hell.

28th June. 5.18 pm.
Left and rushed to my room.
"There he goes again. You can't anything anymore these days, and he'll be off just like that. Sulking whatever."
Ok. That statement of mother crossed the line.
You treated your son just perfectly on his birthday. )*^&%$^$^&....

28th June. 5.25 pm.
Breakdown. I cried. And cried.
I'm soooooooooooo enjoying my birthday.
Son of a *)^&% .
Now where's my friend to celebrate my birthday?
NONE! everyone was on through Facebook.
Effing hell!! No one bothered to even consider a celebration for my birthday.
NONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Come on.. Don't cheat on me.
It's holiday. My friends are at home.
I'm at home. Home effing home.
Some got their own ride.
Some could do it. But then. No one bothered.

Don't you come and say "heyyyy, so sorryyyyy.. It's not like we didn't forget you or so...."
Because it's a damn lie.
Some of you were having a dinner out together, by the way.


Yeah. It's Dated today. 28th June.




Besties huh? Great. Extraordinarily great.

I was dissapointed. Extremely.
Now I knew (no, now i confirmed 100%)
that some of you didn't want me around in the first place.
I'm the one who's idiot enough to tag along with the previous programmes.
Until I had issues with my mother. Lots of times. Stupid sacrifices.

And those others, I've nothing more to say..
I hoped that somebody, I mean somebody, could come down and greet me for real.
I didn't get any phone calls anyway. Just the Facebook. grrrrr.
Except for one or two, I've no idea what's going on anymore..

I just realized that i can make free calls for the whole day, but nobody's worth of my call...

(To those who feels bad about this post, I'm sorry. I'm just having an extremely bad birthday. You wouldn't know, anyway.)

28th June. 6.00 pm.
Laying down on the floor.
Thinking. I'm 20.
Celebrating my birthday by myself.
On the floor.

28th June. 7.00 pm.
Anyone? Hangouts or something?
Please????????????????

28th June. 8.00 pm.
Last call.. Anyone??
Please... I beg you.... (T_T)

28th June. 8.10 pm.
I didn't bother to get out of the room.
Didn't bother to help my mother in the kitchen.
Heartbroken.
I don't care anything for now.
Numb.
Offended with my parents.
Offended with my friends.

28th June. 8.40 pm.
Dinner.
No appetite.
Just plain rice n dishes.
Thanks mother, but it's as the same as any other ordinary day.

28th June. 9.00 pm.
Great. Another thing I've realized.
My 4 brothers n 2 sisters.
and none wished me.
none.

28th June. 10.00 pm.
I give up.
My life sucks.
And it sucks like hell.

28th June. 11.00 pm.
Late posters on the wall, here they come.
Thanks alot, anyway.. At least you had an effort there..

28th June. 11.45 pm.
Wow. My birthday was so far so good. NOT.

29th June. 12.00 midnight.
It's official. I've celebrated my birthday with house curfews,
continuous nagging and no birthday cake.
Great. Extremely great.

And I thought having a birthday on a holiday would make a change once in a while..
Finally a one fine day to celebrate happily with my family and friends.
Guess it didn't go as what I imagined.

29th June. 4.00 pm.
Putting the dot on this post.
A million thanks to those who wished me birthday by Facebook, SMS or instant message (YM).
I hope that this post did not offend you, it's just me telling the truth of how i felt the moment i was 20 today.
Well, at least you bothered to wish me online though.
It's the thought that matters.

It's the thought that matters.

2 comments:

ilieatiqah said...

=( sorry allan...aku wish kat fb jek kot...
actually, aku pn mngalami hal yg sme cam ko mse birthday aku ritu....spend tyme sensorg kat bilik kolej jek au...tdo & online spnjang ari...gilerr bosan...member2 sume de hal msg2...huhuhu...kte nih 2 kali 5 jek kot..

najah hijriah said...

sdh glr hdup mcm tu.. cheer up after this k..=)